Foreign Anatomies
by Maven Alazais
Summary: An accident at Circe's hold will make Batman and Wonder Woman change bodies. With no known way to reverse it, they will have to learn to live in switched bodies, discovering each other and themselves from the beginning. Funny, short. WonderBat with only entertaining purposes .
1. Chapter 1 - The Switch

***Hello, lovely WonderBat people! It's me, Maven Alazais again. I just can't seem to take myself away from this pairing! So, this fic is going to be short and supposed to be funny. I just want this to be happy and not dramatic, so if you're looking for something more serious or tear-bringing, go through the rest of my WonderBat fics. Anyway, thanks for joining me here and I hope you like this!**

 **PS.: Based mostly on the JL-JLU cartoons, with some other DC additions like Nightwing.***

 **FOREIGN ANATOMIES**

 **CHAPTER ONE – THE SWITCH**

Diana couldn't help herself but admire the building. Though quite indifferent on the outside, the inside was amazing. Well, nothing less from Circe's own hideout, she thought. How could an immortal sorceress reduce herself to something simple?

They had been working on finding her hideout for some weeks now. She had expected it to be easier, but it wasn't. Luckily, Nightwing had managed to come up with an algorithm, combining the range of Circe's magic and the reoccurring appearances of Beastiamorphs around the globe. In just a few days, they had spotted the place.

Batman, Green Arrow, Doctor Fate and she had been dispatched for apprehending the witch and her slaves. As they moved forward, through the lush corridors and rooms, more and more Beastiamorphs tried to stop them, unsuccessfully of course. Doctor Fate and Green Arrow went to check a room on the left, while Batman and she kept moving down the corridor. By its end, they entered a big, marble-paved room with high columns reaching the top. Though it was empty in the middle, all around the walls, smaller inner balcony-like structures were holding big cauldrons and the Beastiamorphs working on them. As soon as they were noticed, the beast-like men jumped down the 'balconies' and charged.

Diana untied her lasso and flew over some 'Minotaurs'; Circe's favorite Beastiamorphs. Capturing one, she easily picked him up with her lasso and hit the rest of the incoming ones, much like bowling pins. She finished those still moving with a few punches and placed some unruly hairs behind her ear. She turned around and saw Batman fighting with another Minotaur, having dealt with five of them, she counted. Her eye caught a small movement from above; a Beastiamorph had climbed back up and tried to push the large cauldron on Batman.

With a strong push, she propelled herself forward, flying to the other side of the room. Just as the Minotaur rival was falling to the ground, she managed to push Batman out of the way. The cauldron hit her instead and she fell down.

Batman didn't know why she had pushed him at first. He should have guessed, though, he thought, when he reopened his eyes and saw Diana under the big, black cauldron. The peculiar bluish liquid was oozing, giving off a lavender smell. Diana picked herself up, pushing the cauldron away and growling loudly. She huffed and her eyes shone in anger. She was soaked wet and the sticky liquid was dripping from her hair and her…everything; fingers, legs, back. The Beastiamorph that had dropped the cauldron jumped from the 'balcony' and before it couldn't even land, Diana sent it flying to a wall with a perfectly executed roundhouse kick.

Bruce couldn't help but half-smile a bit. The sight was indeed, rather funny. Diana was shining blue and the smoke of the liquid made it look like her head was on fire.

She cursed something in Greek and turned to him, stretching her hand. He took it and stood up. "You didn't swallow some, did you?" Bruce asked, resuming his serious face and shaking his hand off.

"No."

"You should get checked in at the hospital ward for precaution. We don't know how this potion works."

"I feel fine. Maybe it's some sort of…basis for other potions and no weird ingredients were inside."

"Get checked either way."

"Yes, I will, do not worry. Let's go find the others, maybe they found Circe."

Batman nodded and they left. He took a look at his hand; his enhanced glove had been scratched. Those Beastiamorphs were certainly enhanced as well, to be able to scratch that, he presumed. The fabric hadn't been altered by the potion that came in touch with it, so he came to the conclusion that it wasn't corrosive at least; Diana's suit and skin were both more resilient than ordinary human skin and clothes and it would take time to see it get through on her.

As they exited through the corridor they had entered before, sounds of battle came to their ears. Diana flew ahead, following the sound, and Bruce ran behind her. Soon, they reached what appeared to be the main room; Circe's hold. In the middle of the room, levitating, Doctor Fate was battling telepathically with Circe. Yellow and pink psychic rays were shooting around, as they both tried to subdue their opponent. Green Arrow tried to hit Circe but she managed to withhold a force field that repelled everything.

"Batman!" Diana called and Bruce nodded at her meaningfully. He reached for his belt but before he could take what was inside out, his knees failed him and he fell to the ground. Wonder Woman came to his side and shook him lightly. "Are you okay?!"

"Just take it!" He shouted, coughing. Diana reached for a small pocket of his utility belt. She took a small leather pouch out and losing no time, flew to Green Arrow. When Circe was down, she would check on Bruce again. He wasn't hurt, so she really thought it weird that he fell down like that.

"Give me an arrow!" She told Green Arrow and Oliver handed her one out of his quiver. Diana took a plant residue out of the pouch and rubbed the tip, giving it back to him. "Shoot."

Green Arrow took aim and let go of the arrow. It shoot straight through Circe's field, hitting her armor. The moment it hit her, Circe was also hit by one of Fate's rays and fell to the ground. Green Arrow ran to her and put her in handcuffs before she could wake up. Diana rubbed some more of the ointment on Circe's arms and ankles.

"That should do it." She said, realizing the sides of her vision field were getting blurry.

"Moly*, uh?" Oliver asked and she nodded drowsily. "What happened to you? Took a shower or something?"

"Some sort of p-potion…" Diana started saying before she fell to the ground too. Before she lost conscience, she saw Circe open her eyes and look at her. The sorceress cracked a wide smile, taking a look at her soaked body.

" _I hope it's one of the Beastiamoprhs!"_ She mouthed.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

When Diana reopened her eyes, she recognized the walls of the hospital ward and sighed. The potion wasn't so harmless, she guessed, remembering that she had blacked out.

Something felt weird, though. She couldn't really pinpoint what, though. Physically, she felt fine, she wasn't aching. She was just feeling peculiar, as if her body was out of its limits, or… She didn't know how to describe it. She pulled her hands in front of her and shrieked at the sight of them being bulky, way hairier than hers and most definitely manly. She threw her head left and caught her reflection on the wide windows. This wasn't her! This was Bruce, not her! She started kicking her sheets furiously, lifting herself up. She turned right and saw what was her body alright on the next bed. 'She' was having her fists clenched and an extremely grave expression on her face.

"Wakey wakey, Princess." Diana heard her voice, from her body, say.

"What's going on?!" She said, watching the Diana opposite cringe a little. What came out of her mouth was just a high-pitched Batman voice.

"Guess."

Diana swallowed dryly. "W-We…switched souls?"

"More or less. The potion you fell into was a bodyswap formula."

"Oh, crap." Diana swore. "What now?!"

Bruce in Diana's body shrugged. "Circe's just laughing at her cell. She says she knows no antidote."

"Liar, obviously!"

"We'll see." Bruce said, trying to fold his arms and exhaled loudly. "How do you people move with these things around?! Damn it!"

Diana laughed. Bruce, in her body, trying to struggle with a full breast was funny, no matter how serious the situation was.

Bruce's eyes widened at sight of his own body bursting into laughter. His face was weird, the sound was weird too, the laughter wasn't even his. It was Diana's, but amazingly fearsome, coming out with his voice and facial expressions.

The ward's door opened and in came Green Lantern and Flash.

"How are you feeling, Princess?" Green Lantern asked.

"I've been better!" Diana replied, still inside Bruce's body. Green Lantern nudged Flash and they laughed loudly. Bruce frowned deeply.

"Ugh, man, hearing Batman respond to 'Princess' is better than I thought."

"Cut it out." Bruce warned.

"Sorry, Bats." Flash said. "It's way too funny to leave it. Tell me, do you think I stand a chance with you in Diana's body?" He wiggled his eyebrows. Bruce simply looked at him coldly, starting to admire Diana more for hearing things like that on a daily basis and not going on a rampage.

"Please, tell me you found an antidote." Diana said.

Green Lantern shook his head. "Nothing so far. You can try the magic lasso on Circe when Princess over here"-he looked at Bruce-"is ready." Bruce growled in frustration.

"Hey, Diana," Flash said with a playful grin, "aren't you curious how you look under those hospital robes?"

Diana smiled mischievously, and both their visitors giggled at the sight of Batman grinning like that. "Maybe I am…" She slowly lifted the covers off.

"NO!" Bruce shouted, jumping off the bed. That sudden movement dragged all of his tubes and a part of the wall as well along. Bruce was drawn back by the cement block and fell to the ground with a loud thud, causing small cracks to appear on the floor.

"Super strength. I forgot." Bruce mumbled. Flash lightly kicked the side of his leg, closing the gap between his legs.

"Lady parts too. Don't forget."

"Oh, so, flashing man parts around is acceptable?" Diana asked, throwing the bed sheet off. She placed her hands on her robe, pretending to be tearing it apart. "I've been waiting for this my whole life! Finally free!"

"No!" The three of them shouted simultaneously and Diana grinned at them meanly. They all cringed again; Batman smiling in any way was creepy every time.

Diana let go of her grip. "Good to know…"

"If you don't leave now," Bruce warned, acknowledging how menacing he sounded, even with Diana's voice, "I _will_ use my super strength."

"We'll be back, tough guy." Green Lantern said, tapping Flash's shoulder. "See you around!"

Bruce brought himself up and sighed. He turned to Diana, or rather, his body. "We've got some things to sort out."

"You bet. How did that potion even work?! I'm baffled. Why you?"

"I'm guessing it works out of physical contact."

"When did I ever came into true physical contact with you?" She asked, mildly implying several things that Bruce decided to ignore for the time being.

"When you stretched your hand out for me."

"I only ever get to touch your glove."

"It was torn. Some of the potion you were covered with slid inside."

"Oh… That's why Circe whispered 'I hope it's one of the Beastiamorphs'."

"When did that happen?"

"Shortly before I lost consciousness myself. It makes sense. Imagine the drive of a Beastiamorph in my body."

"Indeed."

"Why didn't it happen instantly, though? I thought potions worked immediately."

"With my short knowledge on sorcery, I'd say that's not certain. Besides, you were practically bathed into it, while I simply touched half a drop."

"Yes. You're right. Now, into more practical matters…"

Bruce tensed up at the thought of those.

 ***Moly is a herb, known to cancel Circe's powers.**

 **So, this was the prologue-intro of this fic! It will be a short one and hopefully funny! Please leave me a small note on how you found it! Thanks for reading!***


	2. Chapter 2 - Adjustments and Surprises

***Thank you all so much for your kind words and fav/follows! I hope it rises up to your expectations. Reminder, as always, that this is just to be a funny fanfic so the characters must be slightly ridiculed for that to work. Anyway, here's the second chapter! Enjoy!**

 **PS.: I hope you don't find it…vulgar at some point, I just couldn't help myself :3***

 **CHAPTER TWO – ADJUSTMENTS AND SURPRISES**

"Do you think I can have the Wondersuit back?" Diana casually asked.

Bruce arched an eyebrow. "You're in my body."

"So? The suit changes size according to the wearer. Though admittedly, the top won't be that flattering on this hideously large thorax…"

"No." He replied sternly. "You're not wearing that thing in my body."

"But you won't know how to bring out its true potential."

"I'll figure it out. The outfits must remain with the according bodies."

"Like hell they will. I'm not fighting crime in your suit-no offense."

"What's wrong with my suit?"

"Too black, too thick."

"It's supposed to protect my body…"

"I'm sorry, but I will change it while I stay in here."

Bruce sighed. "You need to take care of it."

"Of course I will take care of your body, Bruce. It's where I live." She smiled kindly and Bruce didn't know how to respond to Diana smiling through his face. "You do too." Bruce nodded. "And don't worry, I will wear your mask, I know your identity's not known to all and I will keep it that way, you have my word."

Bruce nodded once more. "What about lodging?"

"What about it? Each to his own."

"You can come stay in the Manor if you wish. Looking after your body and its host."

"No need. I trusted you with it when I was there, I trust you even more with yourself inside."

Bruce gave her a good look. Even though it was as if he was staring at a mirror, he could find that peculiar shine of Diana's look in his very own eyes. It really was all about spirit, he thought. "Fine."

"Um, Bruce…" Diana bit her lip lightly. She didn't like this gesture in Bruce's body, though. His lips weren't nearly half as plump and nice as hers.

"Yes?"

"You realize that we…we'll need to shower, right?"

Bruce's look darkened and Diana was fascinated by her own eyes having so many little things going on. She could see his discomfort clearly. "Yes."

"I know it is somewhat uncomfortable for the both of us, but we don't have a choice. Unless we bathe each other…"

"That'd be very time-consuming."

"Oh, by the Gods, you seriously thought about it? I was just joking!" A cold look was the only response she got. She wasn't going to let this perfect opportunity fly, though. "Bruce, I don't have _any_ problem with you seeing and touching my naked body. As long as it's you."

That woman, Bruce thought. So quick-witted. Of course he knew what she meant; there was always a peculiar little s _omething_ between them. Call it chemistry, call it attraction, call it whatever you like. And Diana seemed quite apt on acting on it and trying. He, not so much, however. Not that he didn't want -who is his right mind wouldn't- but because of all the things that got in between and would be extremely complicated if anything happened. Diana seemed to think about that so simply. Sometimes, when he pondered late at night, he even wished he could think of them as simply as she, but he just couldn't. This situation was a special occasion, though, and he didn't have another choice. It was Diana, in the end. With a sigh, he agreed. "Me neither, I guess."

"So, should we go find Circe now?"

Bruce shrugged. "We're not injured so we're free to leave the ward."

"Then let's go."

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

Much time was needed for Bruce to settle with the idea that they didn't need a curtain to separate them while they got dressed up. What good would peeking at the other one would do? They would only see their own bodies. And, for the sake of getting it done as quickly as possible, having lost significant time arguing over the curtain, he agreed. Neither of them bothered to peek anyway.

The facility Circe's was held in was a special cage in the Watchtower, specially designed to keep her down with moly. It was located at the end of a long corridor of cages, some vacant, some with 'guests'.

Diana huffed in discontent as they made their way there.

"What is it?" Bruce asked, after her third sigh of exasperation.

"How do you walk with these between your legs?" She whispered.

Bruce's eyes widened for a second and he stopped walking. Diana halted by his side. "I'm… I'm pretty sure the suit is designed to hold _them_ comfortably." He whispered back.

"This is comfortable?!"

Bruce sighed deeply. "Maybe you haven't placed them correctly."

"How? Am I supposed to put the-"

"I can't believe we're having this conversation."

"And what do you expect me to do? This sucks."

Bruce was a hundred percent certain he had blushed. Or at least, he felt as if he was heating up. This was surreal. "Would you have me show you?!"

"Ugh, just cover me. Those cages here are empty; just make sure no one passes for a second."

Bruce shook his head and moved in front, turning to look at the way of the entrance. No one would come, but just in case. He wouldn't want to explain to anyone why he was standing guard to Diana, in his body, fiddling with his…privates. He shuddered. They had to find a solution to this as soon as possible.

"All set!" Diana announced proudly. Bruce simply spun around and kept walking, while she kept giggling. "This is funny."

"Stop enjoying this."

"Stop being negative. I laugh with what's funny. You should try it too sometimes, I can practically feel your muscles resisting happy expressions."

He remained silent until they reached the cage. Circe burst out in laughter when she saw them.

"Only thinking of Mr. Batman trapped in the extraordinary body of an Amazon drives me crazy. Now seeing it live, that's quite something!" The sorceress said, sitting comfortably on her prison bed. "You've come for an antidote, I suppose."

"Tell us how to undo this, witch!" Diana shouted and Circe barely contained her laughter again.

"I already told the rest of the vigilante visitors, there is no antidote I know for the potion."

"You brewed it!"

"Sure. But it was an experimental potion."

"Enough of this." Diana told Bruce. "Use the lasso."

Bruce, having some trouble with the knot, managed to get the lasso out of its bind, but didn't know what to do with it. Guns, nunchucks, bars, bats and all kinds of things he could handle, but lassos were really not his thing.

Diana snatched it out of his hand and Circe giggled. With one swift motion, the lasso was swung and landed around Circe's stretched-out hand, a sign of goodwill. She shoved it back into his hand. "Here."

"What is the antidote?" Bruce asked, straight to the point.

"I told you, I don't know one." Circe said, with a mean grin on her face. She was being honest after all.

"Why would you brew something like that with no antidote?!"

"See, if the potion worked, imagine if every Beastiamorph managed to touch one of you, so-called heroes. My slaves, inside bodies like yours. Amazing. Didn't you guess?"

"We didn't have time to process your motives, Circe." Diana said. "Not when you put us in a situation like this."

"I couldn't care less." Circe said, brutally honest.

Bruce nudged a pocket of the batsuit Diana was in and spoke. "Name the ingredients. All of them."

"Boy are you serious about it!" Circe replied and licked her lips. "Springwater, hyacinth petals, alcohol, some sapphire dust, my own personal batch of gordi mushrooms,…"

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

One hundred and two ingredients. Who knew a potion would require this much.

Diana entered her chambers baffled. Finding an antidote, if they could really make one, would be harder than she thought. Batman, who had a tape-recorder in one of his pockets, _of course_ , had recorded every single ingredient and said he'd take the list to every sorcerer in the League tomorrow morning. That was something.

First thing she did, she dropped the mask off her face and with one swift movement, took that and the cape off. The rest of the suit required some more time to disassemble. Bruce's build was very solid and getting used to less flexible joints than hers would take some time. Steadily, she made her way to the bathroom.

First thing she did, she took a look at the mirror above the sink. There it was, Bruce's face. She approached the glass and took careful note of all its little features. She had always wished she could get to see all the pretty details of his face, but maybe with him inside the body. This just wasn't the same. She grabbed her newly-acquired firm jawline and turned her head to the sides. It really was a very handsome and masculine face. The eyes, though, were what really made it stand out. They were an incredibly dark shade of blue, almost made them seem black. And, oh, they were very piercing. A true shame his mask didn't show them off.

What she was feeling at that moment, was fairly weird. Though she was practically touching and caressing her own body, she couldn't help but have that fuzzy feeling she got when that happened with the real Bruce. Well, it was its image at least, she thought.

She took a deep breath and prepared to get herself busy with the rest of the body. She took the briefs off without looking, took one more breath and, with no remorse, looked down.

"This is it?" She actually said out loud. The sight didn't excite her. On the other hand, though, what did she expect? A beast or something?

She shrugged and turned her eyes to the large mirror on the wall. She admired the view-his body, with all his scars was truly a piece of art. And after she was done with cleaning that art piece, she would tend to it. Bruce's lips were chapped and his skin was way too rough for her liking. Luckily, she had more than enough skin moisturizer by her bedstand, and a perfect lip-balm too. It wasn't like anyone would see Bruce's body with a 'cherry-pop' lip-balm color on. She was going to call it a day.

Entering the shower, she felt happy about getting to tend this body. Someone had to, really. And what if someone did see him in a red lipstick? Society's ideas about masculinity and femininity were stupid either way.

The hot water came running down and she felt blessed for not having to comb that usual mane of hers.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

"Master Bruce, please stay still." Alfred urged, with a scolding tone.

"I am still, Alfred."

"You twitch."

"I try not to, it's not easy."

"Uh-uh…"

In no scenario would Alfred have imagined, that one warm September night, he would be leaning over his master, Bruce Wayne, in the body of an Amazon Princess dressed in oversized man pajamas, trying to comb his hair.

"I've done stitches to you, sir, and you twitched less."

"I'm used to stitches, I'm not used to my hair aching, Alfred."

Alfred half-smiled. Bruce's tone through Princess Diana's body was funny. Bruce sighed deeply.

"This is an utter embarrassment." He said.

"Relax, sir. It's not that bad. The Princess' body is in excellent shape."

"I'm talking about what we're doing right now…"

"Oh. Well, that's not something to be embarrassed. Hair this dense is indeed, tough to untangle. But we'll get to the… _root_." Alfred giggled at his little pun.

Bruce growled. "I can fend of opponents ten times my size, but I can't comb my hair."

"Technically it's not your hair, sir."

He sighed again. "And I hope I get mine back soon."

"Yes, of course."

"Did you order the clothes?"

"Yes, Master Bruce. They will be here first thing in the morning."

"Good. And what is for dinner?"

"Some duck and basmati rice, with no oil as you ordered for that new regime."

"Alfred, do bring me some ice-cream after it."

"Ice-cream, sir?"

"I want something sweet." Bruce said coldly.

"As you wish, sir." Alfred smiled to himself again.

"Should I go for a haircut?" Bruce asked genuinely.

"I don't think Princess Diana would appreciate a haircut much, sir…"

"Well, we can't keep doing this for long."

"I'll find a rubber band, sir, and you'll just put it in a ponytail, alright?"

Bruce almost screamed. How much more would he have to take?

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

Diana woke up after a fairly wild dream. Her alarm clock hadn't beeped but she guessed it shouldn't take long for its time to come. She pulled herself up her pillows and rubbed her eyes. The very first thing she saw, was an unusual bulk under the sheets.

She giggled. Honestly, she hadn't remembered the nightly routine of the male body and it had indeed, taken her by surprise.

"He is a 'grower', then." She said to herself, laughing again.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

Alfred entered the kitchen, only to see Bruce searching through the tablet cabinet.

"What are you looking for this early, sir?" He asked, worried, taking a look at his watch.

"Some painkillers. Where are they?"

"Here." Alfred replied calmly, easily finding the box. "What's hurting you?"

"I guess it's some sort of intestinal pain." Bruce said, swallowing the painkiller dryly and mumbling something about Diana's nutritional habits. "It'll pass." He made his way to the door and Alfred noticed something at the back of the pajamas.

"Oh, Master Bruce?"

"Yes, Alfred?"

"It's most definitely not intestinal."

"Excuse me?"

Alfred barely contained a laugh and tapped Bruce on the side of his now-thinner arm. "Congratulations. You've just had your very first period, sir."

The look of sheer horror that went through his face made Alfred bite his lip not to burst out in laughter.

 ***I told you I'd have them ridiculed a bit! Well, new bodies come with all sorts of perks!**

 **Next up, Superman sees them switched for the first time and the first mission begins!**

 **I hope you enjoyed it. I've had a good time writing it, I hope it wasn't too, I don't know, stupid. I liked it. :P Please, do tell me how you found it!***


	3. Chapter 3 - Patience and Lasers

***I am immensely grateful of your fav/follows, and most of all, your reviews. The fact that you enjoy this means the world to me and I thank you from the bottom of my heart.**

 **Here it goes, then!***

 **CHAPTER THREE – PATIENCE AND LASERS**

Diana had woken up with an amazing mood, for no particular reason. And the fact that she was in a foreign body wasn't going to ruin that. It was still early to present for duty, so she headed for the training room. Predictably enough, it was empty.

The new tracksuit she had bought was comfortable enough to move around as she pleased. She had to get to know this new vessel as soon as possible in order to resume her League duties. She placed herself in front of the training target and took her fighting stance. She planted a straight right hook on the dummy's face.

"Hm." She mumbled. The punch's force was much, indeed. It lacked, of course, the brunt her super strength granted, but it would suffice to knock out the enemies. Not toss them several meters away, but it would do.

She went on with uppercuts, jabs and some kicks, trying chest kicks, side-leg kicks and a whole set of moves. In the end, she was satisfied with the result. Bruce's body, she realized, was built to withstand and take many hits while still fighting strongly. She could sense the thick structure of his bones –she didn't want to think how many times they had all been fractured and broken- and the whole volume of the muscle mass. It was hard to believe this body was actually solely human…

She took a step back and started performing her usual training routine. Soon she realized that her moves were kind of hard on Bruce's joints. The power she got was more than enough, but she would have to try some other stance, she thought.

"Try this." She heard a voice from behind call and she span around. She rolled her eyes. Of course, she thought.

Bruce stepped out of the dark corner he was hiding, approaching her. The smaller body he now had made it easier for him to sneak inside and lurk for as much as he liked.

"How long have you been here?" Diana asked, noticing her body's outfit. 'She' was in a dark grey turtleneck, some black fitted pants and a pair of flat leather boots. Bruce had, naturally, accompanied the outfit with his _stylistically flawless_ utility belt and a small knife tied around her calf. Bruce was wearing the tiara, the bracelets and the lasso, so she guessed he had the rest of the Wondersuit on as well, just underneath those unbelievably gloomy clothes.

"Long enough."

"I don't really appreciate stalkers, Bruce."

"You're doing the moves wrong." He said, ignoring her comment.

"You and I have both enough combat experience to know my moves are beyond good." She arched an eyebrow.

"Not in this body."

Diana sighed. "What do you want, Bruce?"

"To show you. Do it like this." Bruce moved in front of the dummy.

"Wait-"

Before Diana could intervene, Bruce hit the dummy's head with a jab and the head went flying to the opposite wall. Bruce's eyes widened.

"This isn't an enhanced training target…" Diana mumbled.

"It figures."

"If I need to fix my posture, you need to learn how to control your new strength."

"One thing at a time, Princess."

Diana half-smiled. "Calling me 'Princess' feels so weird today."

"Indeed. Now, watch this closely." Bruce performed the jab again slowly, hitting the air. Diana noticed its form.

"Let me try, then." She placed herself in front of the target again and punched it twice, trying to have her wrist joint a little less twisted than how she usually did. She rubbed her shoulder when she was done. "It's somewhat better, you're right."

Bruce simply nodded.

"Oh!" Diana exclaimed. "I almost forgot about it. Bruce…" He gave her a good look. "You, um, you might be –in a couple of days- getting your…period."

Bruce averted his look. "Don't tell me…" Diana said and started giggling. "It came early!"

"It's not funny." Bruce growled.

"You bet it's not! But, oh, it feels so nice having a man go through this for once." Bruce remained silent, with a perplexed look on his face. "I think it's time you and I had a talk about this, then."

"No need." He replied coldly.

"Every need. No Internet search results are going to help you. Theoretically you may know, but practically, that's a whole different matter."

"I said no."

"And I said yes. It's my body so you need to know how to properly take care of it."

Bruce surrendered to that argument and sighed. Diana led them to the bench by the wall and took the mask off. She took a good look at him; he was feeling uncomfortable and it was obvious.

"Can you relax?" She asked. "It's no big deal."

"I am relaxed."

"Yes…Of course… So, first things first, it will hurt."

"I know."

"Good. I guess you already took some painkillers."

"Yes."

"Don't worry, my period only hurts for a couple of days, so you won't have to suffer for long. Then, tell me, did Alfred bring you pads or tampons?"

"Both." He replied, always amazed by how Diana seemed to know how his household worked.

"And what did you choose?"

Bruce dropped his face into his head and mumbled. "This isn't happening."

"Come on now, you big baby! I'm trying to help you here!"

He sighed deeply. "Pads." He felt like scolding himself for letting Diana do what she wanted with him.

"Oh, thank the Gods. Tampons don't really hold the blood well"-Bruce cringed a bit-"for me and pads are so much more comfortable. Of course, you may try tampons if you want, whatever suits you more, but you'll have to change it more often and-"

"No!" He exclaimed. "I refuse to-to…stick anything in there."

Diana laughed. "Alright, alright! Now, I also guess Alfred brought you all kinds of pads."

"Yes…"

"Then use the thick and long ones today and tomorrow and switch to the medium ones after that. Oh, and don't change the pads too often-I guess you've already changed a few."

"Was I not supposed to?!"

"No, silly. They are made to last for hours at a time. Only when you feel it full you need to change it."

Bruce felt like puking. He could barely look at the pads when he visited the bathroom. He had seen a fair share of blood in his life, much of it his own, but having it come from…down below and considering it normal made his gut turn for some reason. Deep down, he was starting to have much greater respect for his female co-Leaguers. "Fine."

"Keep showering like you usually do, too. There's no need for anything special, just make sure you have clean towels."

"Was there really need for that last remark?"

"…I guess not. And here's pretty much what you need to know for now. I hope we'll be switched back before you get to have another one."

"You think I am going to wait in this body for a month?! I'd be damned!"

"Is it in our hands, Bruce? We don't have an antidote and no clue on how to make one."

"We'll take it in our hands. The sorcerers have all received the ingredients and J'onn is putting them all to an antidote-brewing priority mission."

"Good to know!"

Bruce got up. "See you around." Diana nodded and he started walking to the door. Before he reached for the doorknob, he heard a loud thud and turned around. Diana had fallen face-down to the floor and tried to get up. She lifted her head up and smiled goofily. Bruce thought that that was a sight he would never get used to, and he didn't want to. His face was not the one for these expressions.

"Stupid cape! Heh!" Diana said and stood up, dusting her knees. "Let this all stay between us, please!"

Bruce shook his head in disappointment and left, more frustrated than ever.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

Bruce almost crashed the controller he was holding when Diana entered the main hall to present for duty.

She was in a white, long-sleeved shirt with a bright red Batman logo on the chest, some denim bermuda pants, light grey military boots and his cape-mask, only that the bottom part of the cape appeared to be somewhat…cut. Diana took her usual power-stance, with her hands on her hips and legs spread out shoulder-length apart, and smiled widely to the rest of the Leaguers.

Some muffled chuckles later, the controller was easily crashed and Batman made his way to Wonder Woman with big, furious strides. As big as he could make them, of course, wearing that weird diaper-like thing in his underwear.

"What do you think you're doing?!" He said to her-his?- face.

"Presenting for duty, of course."

"What are these clothes?!"

"I told you, I'm not wearing your suit, I don't like how it feels. And till I customize it a bit, I'll be working in these."

Customizing his suit?! Wearing these?! This was going too far. "You're in my body, you cannot wear these things!"

"You covered my Wondersuit with a hideous turtleneck. You have absolutely no right to speak."

They exchanged a long, agitated stare and Black Canary passed from their side.

"Get a room, you two." She said, grinning playfully and Diana gave her a curious side-glance. "Girl, don't look at me like that through Batman's body, it creeps me out."

"What happened to you?" Diana asked, looking at how Dinah's hair had turned red.

"I had an accident with some color shampoos. Don't worry, it'll fade in some days."

"It looks nice, though!"

"Why, thanks!"

"Knock off the small chat." Bruce said sternly.

"You won't tell us what to do, Mr. Broody. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go check some things. Superman's coming back from his inter-galactic mission today and I need to give him a heads-up when he arrives. See ya!"

"Bye!" Diana said and smiled.

Bruce snatched Diana's arm and started dragging her outside. Diana simply laughed.

"What is so funny?!" He shouted.

"The fact that you're dragging me out so effortlessly. See how truly easy it's for me to shove you around? Yet I don't, because we're comrades and comrades are supposed to _respect_ each other."

Bruce stopped marching and let go of her hand, turning around to look at her. She had her arms folded over the red logo and she didn't seem too pleased now. "Dragging me out like that wasn't very kind."

He sighed. He was about to respond, when the zeta-tube behind them started working and the all-too-familiar outline of their Kryptonian friend started forming.

"Hey, Clark!" Diana greeted waving, when he came through the tube. The happy look on the man's face was replaced by a look of sheer disbelief. He took a good look at what was supposed to be Batman and Wonder Woman.

"Who are you?!" He asked, standing back.

"It's us!" Diana said, lifting her eyebrows. The real Diana, for Superman, had her eyebrows furrowed and looked at him coldly, wearing some sort of peculiar black overalls.

"Oh, you're finally here, Clark!" Black Canary said, coming out of the main hall but didn't move any further, when met with Clark's angry look.

"Who are you people, and what did you do to my friends?!" He clenched his fists.

"Relax, it's just us." Black Canary said but Superman didn't seem to calm down.

"Where are they?!" He kept shouting and his eyes turned red, ready to shoot his laser beams. Bruce's eyes widened, as he prepared to fall down to shield from the incoming ray, but Diana, in his body, grabbed and lifted his arm up, before he managed to duck and the laser beam was reflected off the Wondersuit's bracelets.

J'onn emerged through the floor in front of them and entered Clark's mind telepathically, to calm him down. Superman took a good look at them. "What's going on?"

"Batman and Wonder Woman," the Martian explained, "were unfortunately involved in a body-swapping situation. Black Canary simply dyed her hair."

"Accidentally." Dinah said.

"Body-swap?!" Superman asked in disbelief. Bruce sighed. "Oh my God!" And then he started laughing, loud enough for his laugh to echo around. Diana joined him in the laughter, and when he saw her laugh through Bruce's body, he laughed even more, folding in half. Bruce kept looking at him in anger.

"Stop laughing." He said and Clark wiped a tear from the corner of his eye.

"I'm so sorry for attacking you! I honestly thought I had entered some parallel dimension where you were all horribly replaced by somebody else, or that an alien parasite was eating out Batman's brain, to have him act like that, I don't know…"

"Was that a reason to fry the people of the other dimension?" Diana asked smiling, and Clark huffed.

"I panicked. God, Diana, what have you done to Bruce?"

Diana shrugged. "Hear?" Bruce said. "Go put on the regular suit!"

"No, no!" Clark said. "I kind of like this new outfit. Feels more…summery!"

"Thank you, Clark!" Diana said and Clark looked at them both in curiosity. Diana's words in Bruce's gravelly voice and Bruce's stormy look in Diana's clear eyes seemed so weird. What a surprise, he thought.

"Lois would give a fortune to have a photo of you like this!"

"Don't you dare." Batman warned and Clark simply grinned.

"Come." Dinah said. "I'll give you a heads-up."

"You two, come with me." J'onn said, addressing Diana and Bruce. "I have a mission to assign you with. Are you ready?"

They both shrugged slightly. "That remains to be seen."

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

"Arctic, criminals, bombs. Perfect!" Diana said. "What are we waiting for?"

Bruce frowned. "It's a recognition mission. Should be enough to see how we can cope in these new bodies till we switch back."

"That was what I thought." J'onn said. "You are to leave tomorrow morning. Be ready."

They both nodded and headed for the door.

"Time to put on some fur!" Diana said decisively.

"What fur?"

" _The_ fur." She said, and for some reason Batman felt like he was going to be even angrier than for the bermuda pants.

A small part of him kept wishing this was actually a nasty dream, and he would get to wake up soon.

 ***Just more of a getting-used-to chapter. Then we get to explore a bit more of the bodyswap magic in combat!**

 **I hope you liked it, please leave me a small comment down below.**

 **Also, sorry for any typos or wrong expressions that have slipped my attention! Thanks for reading!***


	4. Chapter 4 - Iced Down and Heated Up

***I had originally planned to upload this much sooner, but I had written half of it and never really got to write the other half up until now, because of my University exams (I'm in Medicine, which makes them, trust me, really tough) and the fact that my country is going through a shitstorm and it's keeping all of us rather preoccupied. Anyway, thank you all for waiting and supporting this fic! Happy reading!***

 **CHAPTER FOUR – ICED DOWN AND HEATED UP**

Diana couldn't help but stare at Bruce in that outfit. It was so nice.

"Can you stop that?" He asked coldly, giving her a side-glance. Inspecting glances was, indeed, his thing, he noticed, getting to see his face in that look for a change. It didn't make it any less awkward, though.

"No, I just can't grasp how good I look. I've always wanted to wear this, and never got the chance."

"Mm-hm."

Bruce was in conflicting emotions when he found out, just this morning, what Diana meant with 'the fur'. At first, he was somewhat relieved to see that she didn't have any more embarrassing plans for his body –even though no one was supposed to see them where they were going. He didn't want to see himself in a big, round, Russian fur hat; yes, he had thought about it all night long.

At second thought, he was frustrated when he realized that he would get to be dressed into that. Diana insisted too much, though, and in the end, he obliged. Like always. Soon, he was into a very fitted, white, long-sleeved full-body suit, with many pockets and insulation layers, the innermost being of fur. The end of the sleeves and the trousers was lined with some beige and brown fur as well. The gloves that went with the suit, out of white leather, were lined with the same fur too and the outfit was accompanied by a large hood, also lined with that fur, that perfectly covered the head and framed the face just as it should. Diana had picked a pair of white high-heeled boots as well, but Bruce couldn't move in those, so she had to accept the black, flat ones of his. What she wouldn't accept, though, was the casual ponytail Bruce usually put her hair into. And so, she sat him down and braided her hair into a long, side fishtail braid while Bruce huffed and huffed until it was done. He couldn't believe the trouble she'd go into just for a recognition mission.

What he couldn't get his mind off, though, was something that he _felt_ when she was braiding the hair. He had felt it before, it wasn't unusual; that peculiar little electricity when Diana and he got a little too close. But what was unusual, was the fact that he sensed it when it was practically his own body touching him, or at least, the hair. It had really perplexed him; why did it appear? It wasn't normal, it was his own body, and he wasn't as narcissistic as he let his Bruce Wayne persona seem when he appeared in venues. But he was in a different body, so maybe what this was, was pure physical attraction. Aside from the mental one, he noted and decided to leave the matter for now, when Diana brought him a round mirror and asked him to verify how 'cute' he looked.

Back to the present, he sighed and kept his eyes straight, piloting the plane. It wouldn't be too long before they reached their destination in the Arctic Zone. For that reason, he had also brought Diana a specific lighter-colored suit he had, for camouflage reasons, along with a suiting, fully-equipped utility belt. He'd never worn that one before, but he thought it could be a good 'crash test' to see how the suit handled Diana and her moves.

"Damn." Diana mumbled. "So many good moves I can't do… I really wish I could still fly."

"Mm-hm."

She gave him a good look. "Think we'll actually get to fight?"

"Mm-hm."

"I love your insight on this, thank you."

"Mm-hm."

Diana rolled her eyes and laid back on her chair. She really was in a good mood and felt like talking. But it was Bruce, of course. What did she expect.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

They found a small spot behind an ice boulder than would keep their jet hidden and protected, and 'parked' without being detected. J'onn's coordinates showed action happening in this wide area, with no particular details on what or who. They suspected a smuggling network underneath, since no proper surveillance had ever been put up in those regions, run by some ice-handling villains they hadn't managed to catch. What they needed to do, was to confirm it and leave. The League needed to organize a proper mission to dismantle the trade, if that was what was going on there.

Diana stood disappointed by the plane. "So, are we going on foot or by flying?"

Bruce half-smiled. "Why not by flying? It will be quicker."

"You're just happy that you won't be the one being carried for a change."

"Mm-hm."

" 'Mm-hm' me once more and I'll beat you to a pulp."

Bruce raised an eyebrow. "Mm-hm."

Diana's eyes shone angrily. "I'm holding myself just because I don't want to mess with my face."

"…Mm-hm." Diana exhaled loudly in frustration. "Let's get going, Princess." He said, thinking how he should really limit the 'Princess' when Diana was in his body.

Bruce pushed himself upwards and levitated, giving himself a mental 'pat on the back' for doing it well. Diana watched him carefully and lifted her hands just a bit, waiting for him to grab her and get going. Bruce lifted her much like she did when they were in their proper bodies and they started flying.

To Diana's surprise, he wasn't faltering, or lost his balance and track. He kept flying perfectly well, holding her steadily and firmly.

"You've been practicing." She stated confidently. He remained silent. "You know, your silence is the best confirmation I can get."

"What is it, Diana?" He asked exasperated.

"You've been practicing your flying. I can tell."

"What if I did?"

Diana smiled to herself. He had _so_ been practicing. And not just flying. Carrying someone too; he was preparing for this.

Of course, Bruce wasn't going to admit that a window in his living room needed immediate repair, or that Alfred's ankle hurt a bit today. Those were just minor details.

They stopped before every icy mound they could find and hid in order to check for incomings. They flew for a little while without any disturbance and were about to get going when Bruce landed them down again before they even began.

"What is it?" Diana whispered and Bruce pointed with his fingers over the ice mound. Diana nodded in understanding and before Bruce went to touch the utility belt she was wearing, she got her hand in the pocket first, taking out a small, rectangle screen and smiling to him in a show-off-ish way. Bruce wasn't the only one practicing; she had spent a fair amount of time trying to inspect all of the belt's gadgets. She pressed the button to turn it on and turned it to the direction to where he had pointed. The dark green screen showed flashes of orange and yellow in man-like shapes.

"Seems like three people in heavily insulated uniforms." Bruce whispered. Diana nodded and pressed some other buttons on the screen. The sensor calculated the distance of the heat sources to be around ten meters away. Before she could suggest anything, Bruce had jumped off, flown to the three guys and taken them out. Diana checked both ways before getting away from the mound and ran to him.

"What's wrong with you?!"

"I had to take them out."

"You could have let me in too, you know, before storming off."

"Take them out quickly."

Diana sighed. "For what reason anyway? You insisted that it's just a recognition mission. We would have seen where they went inside from and followed them or something…"

Bruce lifted a card between his pointer and middle finger. "They have entrance cards and they were about to use it. Unless you wanted us to break the entrance and quite certainly activate the alarm, then I had to do this."

"…Mm-hm."

Bruce half-smiled and turned to the fainted incomings. Two were men, one was a woman. They were dressed in some loose white coats, and he found it quite convenient. "Take the coat from one of them."

"Alright." Diana said, leaning down to remove the garment. When she put it on, she started chuckling.

"What's so funny?" Bruce said monotonously, keeping his eyes on the buttons of the coat he was putting on.

Diana shook her hands quickly, making the coat's sleeves flap around, as they were too long for Bruce's arms. Bruce looked up and sighed exasperated while she kept on giggling like a girl.

"It's been such a long time since I wore something with flappy sleeves." Bruce made a 'tsk' sound and she just smiled, turning the sleeves up to his wrists.

After they completed their outfits by putting on the dark goggles the knocked-out wore, Bruce kneeled down and slid the card through a barely-there crack in the ice. Diana admired, once again, his very keen eye. With no sound at all, the ground nearby the unconscious bodies, split open, revealing a metal staircase. Bruce took the card and they descended the stairs cautiously.

By the end of the staircase, they entered a long, grey corridor, lighted by some long, industrial lights. Steps approaching echoed and Bruce tensed up a bit, instructing Diana to 'act natural'.

"Gee, thanks, I'd never think of it on my own." Diana whispered back sarcastically and they started walking until they met with two guards –judging by the way they held their weapons and by the fact that the ones Bruce took out didn't have any on them-. They simply nodded at them, letting them pass and they kept on going, with no further interaction.

"That was easy." Diana commented, looking around.

Bruce frowned and kept being alert. "Did you turn the tracker on?"

"Yes, don't worry. By the time we're done strolling around, you'll have a very nice map of the place." Bruce simply nodded.

Soon, they stumbled upon two doors. Tracing no sound coming from the inside, they opened the locks with the card and entered. The first one was just a simple storage, with some spare coats on, while the second was a big office, with many files lying on the shelves.

"See if you can find something interesting." Bruce said.

"Do _you_ count?" Diana asked playfully and he decided to ignore her. "Tsk. You're no fun."

"We're not here for fun."

"Why are you always so apt in pointing out the obvious?" She asked, shuffling through some of the most recent files and getting no answer. All she found in the papers were reports of cargos and transported boxes of chemicals.

"Haven't found anything other than chemical transports."

"I see."

She turned around and saw him taking some photographs of the files currently opened on the office's desk. "What about you?"

"Maps and coordinates. Probably the transport destinations."

"Do they ring any bells?"

"Some." Diana approached him to see as well, when the door swung open, and another person like 'them' appeared.

"What are youdoing here?" He asked, blocking the door.

Diana casually gathered the files that were open on the desk and picked them up. "The Boss said they'd like to review some of the coordinates."

He kept on looking at them suspiciously but Diana simply turned to Bruce and taking a very deep tone –a fraction of her liking the way how grim she sounded in this body, said "Did you find the other file?"

"Yes, it should be just about here." He said, randomly selecting a file from a pile on the desk's side, flipping to the first page, and nodding, pretending that this was what he was looking for.

Diana made some decisive steps towards the guy and pinned her eyes on his face. She was certain that though the goggles were dark, he could feel the intensity of the stare very well. "Is something wrong here?" The guy swallowed dryly and made a step inside, clearing the way. "N-No, no. Go."

The door closed behind them and they kept on walking down the corridor. "Nice acting." Bruce complimented and she smiled.

For the next hour, they kept on walking around, examining empty rooms and avoiding those with people inside, marveling at the size of this underground network. Soon enough, they found a large gate. Not doing anything to attract attention, they silently walked through it, entering what seemed to be the 'parking' spot for some aircrafts. Many workers were carrying boxes and tubes inside the planes, all ordered by a blue-skinned woman in the middle of the room and Diana, upon taking a look at her, tensed up.

"You need to leave _now_." Diana said, and Bruce realized why. The woman had pinned her eyes on them and stared. Bruce pretended he received a call on an imaginary earpiece and left the way they came inside. Diana, trying –in vain, she knew- to keep their cover, kept on walking inside, picking up her pace a bit. Killer Frost*, however, projected ice from her hands and landed in front of her.

"What's this?" She asked, pointing at the files she was holding, baiting her.

"It's just the destinations' coordinates." Diana said, giving Bruce's accent a heavy lisp on the s and the r, hoping she wouldn't recognize Batman's voice and way of speaking.

"Let me see." She said, snatching the file out of her hands and squinting her eyes. Diana didn't flinch. Killer Frost examined the files, seeing that the worker in front of her was telling the truth. "Who's the other one with you?"

Diana's mind's gears began working furiously. Now that it came down to it, there was only one way to do this. She shrugged. "Some new worker, I suppose. She is somewhat weird, though."

"Where's she going?"

"She said she got a call, though I got none, so…I don't know. Maybe you'll catch her in the corridors."

"You bet I will…" She said, pushing the files back to Diana and ordering her to go back to work. Diana nodded deeply and pretended to keep on descending, while Killer Frost ran up and through the gate. Diana, then, turned around and started running, hoping she hadn't caught up to Bruce yet.

Killer Frost, using her ice beams, was significantly faster than her in this body, though, and no matter how fast she ran, she could find no sign of her or Bruce on the corridors. Knowing she should lose no time at all, she took the monitor they used before out. Killer Frost's body temperature was unbelievably low, so such an abnormality would be caught by the sensor. With the monitor on hand and trying not to bump into other workers, she scanned the rooms around. Soon, she picked up their signals; a very, very vibrant red as Bruce in her body, and a very, very cold blue as Killer Frost.

She tried to open the door, when she remembered that Bruce had the card. Knowing that this would result in an alarm either way and taking a last look at the current positions of the two, she used one of the suit's mini-bombs to blow off the door. Predictably enough, the alarms sounded around the place.

The ice woman, with her hand on Bruce's cheek and Bruce as well turned reflectively to look at her and the blown-off door. Killer Frost tried to shoot an ice beam at her direction and instinctively, she tried to fly away, momentarily forgetting that she couldn't do it anymore. To her luck, Bruce, seizing the opportunity, kicked her in the abdomen and the beam missed. Killer Frost growled and fired an even bigger beam all around, right when Diana threw two smoke bombs. Bruce protected himself with Diana's bracelets, and Diana managed to duck behind the villain, barely escaping. If her guess was correct, the opposite wall should have been frozen by now.

"I can sense you, little Amazon!" Killer Frost hissed. "You can't get away from me!"

Before the smoke escaped the room, Diana used the monitor again, pulling it close to her face and pinpointing Frost's location. It was a risky choice, but she had to try. "Skipse!" She shouted in Greek, knowing Bruce would understand her. (Trans.: Duck!/Take cover!") Luckily, Bruce was quick enough in falling to the floor, and she was quick enough in firing the electrocution rope around her, though she almost missed. As the smoke vanished, she saw Frost falling to the floor and she ran to Bruce. Her body had gone very pale and she helped him up.

"I need you to put all of your strength in a punch. Can you do it?" She asked.

Bruce nodded and stood on his own, understanding what Diana meant. He took two sharp breaths and focused, landing a punch in the middle of the wall. The ice and the cement started cracking. Another punch later, they had fallen down and they could now make their way through the ice. Bruce, gathering all the strength he had left, punched the solid ice, making way for them further. A few meters later, he couldn't go anymore. Diana placed two small range bombs at the tunnel he had dug and as they went off, ice came down and sealed the entrance, leaving them protected in a small, frozen bubble. Diana took off her loose, borrowed coat and put it on the ground, helping Bruce lay on it.

"I didn't expect it to be this bad." Bruce said between pants.

"I didn't expect Killer Frost to be here." Diana said, making sure the ice around was nice and solid. "A super-strong body like mine omits too much heat for her not to notice…I hope she didn't 'suck' too much." Bruce simply kept breathing heavily in response.

Diana took a seat next to him and searched for something in her pockets. "We need to get your-my body up and running. Here." She handed him a candy bar, wrapped in a bright orange cover.

Bruce looked at it reluctantly. "What's this?"

"A high-calorie energy-giving candy bar. Flash gave it to me; all high-metabolism heroes need to have one, he says. Didn't think he'd turn out right this soon."

Bruce split the wrapper open and took a bite off the candy bar –it was rather tasty- and hoped his energy would come back quick enough. Now that Killer Frost knew they were there, their time was shortened. The electro-ropes wouldn't keep her down for too long. Just as he was swallowing the third and final piece of the candy, Diana scooted even closer, until their bodies were in very close contact. Bruce gave her a stern side-look.

"It's the penguin method!" She exclaimed with a smile. "Why should I let my body heat go to waste, when you can make some use out of it? Here, here." She said, passing her large arm around his shoulders. Bruce frowned deeply and sighed, as both of them acknowledged how messed up all of this was.

"The mission didn't go quite as planned, eh?" Diana asked, after some minutes of utter silence.

"We did see what was happening."

"You could say so… and who's running it."

"Running _just_ the transports. I doubt Frost's the mastermind of this."

"Well, it is something at least." Bruce, once again, didn't reply. Diana had gotten used to it after all this time.

She soon realized, that after one also got used to the weirdness of the situation, that she was feeling…nice. Though they were sealed off in an icy bubble, with a network of villains probably on their trail as time passed, she couldn't help but feel pleasant. She was holding Bruce in her arms, they were very close and no one was there to disturb. If only the setting was a bit different, she wished.

"Hey, Bruce…" She said, removing her mask and observing her foggy breath.

"Mm?"

She scooted just a bit further, withdrawing her arm, so she could look at him. Or her face, anyway. "What if this is irreversible?"

"It's not."

"What if it is?"

"It's not!" He fired back, frowning. Diana noticed how he was starting to recover; some of the redness of her face's cheek was coming back.

She sighed at his stubbornness, but found some interest in his reactions. "I think we should be reasonable…" Bruce arched an eyebrow, "…and consider this unlikely, yet plausible, scenario, Bruce."

"There's no-"

"Know what I think?" Diana said with a smirk. "I think you know what's going to happen if this is the case; Bruce Wayne and Diana Prince will be spending an awful lot of time together, since we'll need to dictate the proper actions for each other," she approached him a bit, "and you're afraid of what that time will do…"

Bruce's eyes had widened. He didn't know what to make of Diana's prediction. What did he mean by 'afraid of that time'? And why was he feeling so…flushed? He couldn't identify this heated-up sentiment as anger, or threat, but something that he wasn't ready to address, unless he was prepared to start questioning his morals and sexuality. Because though it was his own two eyes staring at him so intensely, all he could now sense was that particular vibe Diana gave off whenever they were alone, and he constantly had to restrain himself from indulging anything his self, honestly, craved for.

"And now that we got you energized enough, why don't you use that super-strength to get us out of here?" Diana almost whispered and Bruce jumped and flew, completely full of energy.

Knowing the shortest way out would be straight up, he started punching the ice of the top, with each hit being stronger than the previous. Diana, smiling at his zeal, moved to the corner of the 'bubble', not to get hit by the falling ice, and waited.

When Bruce finally managed to break the superficial layer, with ice shards flying to every direction, he popped his head out, and, predictably, saw several armed guards approaching. Losing no time, he slid back down.

He found Diana lying down, supporting her weight on the elbows, and with one leg crossed over the other. "Done?" She asked.

Bruce was angry now, though. "Stop. Making. My. Body. Look. Like. This!" He hissed, approaching her through the ice dust.

"Stop making my face look like I'm in a funeral."

"Get up!"

Diana shot him a threatening look, sitting up. "Oh, honey, do _not_ give me orders."

"There's g-" Bruce started shouting when Diana sprung up and shouted even louder.

"Shut up! I know!" She moved the heat-sensor in front of his face. "Now listen."

 _Just a couple of minutes later…_

With a battle cry that certainly wasn't made for Bruce's voice, Diana was propelled through the little tunnel he had dug like a missile. Before she got to land, she threw her readied batarangs at the incoming guards, frustrated and cursing at how low her accuracy was with that weapon technique; she must have only gotten three. No matter, she thought. She still had plenty of gizmos to work, and a body ready to brawl. Her cape flowed around as she threw the last two smoke bombs and just as smoke filled the place around them, Bruce flew right over her and onto the blinded guards, dragging them all onto each other. Using the sensor again, Diana punched two, stealing the weapon of one. Shouting the signal word at Bruce, he finished off his current opponent and got down to his knees, shielding his front with the bracelets. Diana activated the ray weapon – Bruce had made a small assessment of it, based on what he had seen from the guards as they passed by them earlier- and fired around, clearing out the rest of them. The smoke grew thin and she soon spotted her body just some meters away, standing up.

"Oh, no!" She said, approaching Bruce.

"What happened?" He asked, looking around and making certain that they were all taken out.

"You burnt the hood's fur!"

Bruce gave her an ironic look. "You were blindly firing rays, and I was supposed to mind the fur…"

Diana sighed. "I would have been able to deflect them all better…"

"And I would have been able to get at least seven with the batarangs…"

Diana shot him a mean look, which he immediately returned, with an intense stare. Before Diana got to turn the look into something deeper, Bruce averted his. "Let's get going."

Diana held the gun tightly –she would turn it for further analysis at the League- and Bruce flew them back to the jet.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

When Diana entered her chambers, she immediately took off the suit-it was warming her up too much- and pressed the power button of her computer. After she was done showering up and putting on some clean, new, brightly-colored shorts, she sat down and went through her emails. Something caught her fancy and she grabbed the phone, dialing a number she knew by heart.

" _Wayne Manor, who am I speaking with?"_

"Good evening, Alfred. It's me, Diana."

Diana heard Alfred chuckle a bit. " _Oh, excuse me, Princess, it's just that hearing you announce yourself with Master Bruce's voice is something my poor old brain simply can't get used to."_

"Don't worry, Alfred. Now, is he there?"

" _Of course, I'll connect you to…downstairs in a bit. Also, please tell me when you will be available to come over for a tuxedo fitting."_

"Oh, so he told you."

" _Well, admittedly, Master Bruce was not too excited but he thought you wouldn't miss the chance and informed me."_

"Indeed I wouldn't. Don't tell me he's thinking of passing!"

" _That, I'm afraid, you'll have to discuss with him."_

"Alright then, pass me on."

" _Let me know when you're available. Good evening, Princess."_

A dialing tone later, her own voice came from the speakers.

" _You saw it?"_

"Is this really how I sound on the telephone?!"

" _Diana…"_

"Alright, alright! Yes, I did. Alfred invited me over to get dressed up in your tuxedos."

"Mm-hm."

"So, are you going to come over for a fitting too or will you have me just send the gown over to your place before the gala?"

" _Neither."_

"That wasn't an option."

" _It is now."_

"Bruce, you are, as of lately, representing myself. You can't possibly pass on the celebratory gala of the new truce in the Middle East! You were supposed to be fighting for it for years!"

" _Amazons do get sick, like the rest of the world."_

"You'll come, if you don't want Bruce Wayne to appear in fluo."

" _Don't blackmail me, Princess. You know this doesn't work."_

"Come on, Bruce. This is important to me! I've been expecting this for months!"

" _You'll go, so there's no problem."_

"You know that's not the point. Please, Bruce. Do me this favor and I promise to ease up on the bermuda shorts from now on."

" _Now this sounds tempting."_

Diana huffed. "Great. I knew you'd come to your senses!"

" _I didn't say I agreed."_

"Thank you so much for doing this for me!" She went on like he never spoke.

" _Diana, I swear, you're-"_

"-going to look dazzling in the gown I've picked, I know. Now, I must go feed your body something proper. See you tomorrow!" And just like that, she hung up.

Bruce couldn't find the strength to call her back and give her an earful. She could get so irritating at times, and yet he could never get round to being angry with her. That damn witch, he thought.

The Batcave's door opened, and down came Alfred with some pieces of cloth on his hands.

"What is it, Alfred?"

"I am terribly sorry to interrupt, sir, but it's been almost a week since you've had a different body and different…clothing needs. We need to order some more underpants for you, in your current state."

Bruce's eyebrow twitched. "Yes, go order some."

"I thought that maybe you could help me on which you found more comfortable wearing this week."

Bruce barely contained a loud scream, as Alfred spread some skin-colored panties on his working surface. "So, which one?" The butler asked, with a tremendously serious face.

"Alfred!" He said through his teeth.

"Sir." He replied calmly. "I'm waiting."

"I don't know!"

"What do you mean you do not know? You were the one wearing them."

Bruce took three, sharp and deep breaths and growling a bit, pointed to a type he thought he remembered wearing one day. It wasn't like he could find any significant differences between the lot Alfred had exhibited, other than the typical 'granny panties' and the G-string. He wondered why Alfred had those, too. He knew they had ordered a variety of female undergarments the night when he first came home as Diana, but he didn't know the pack contained all of those. In fact, he didn't want to know.

"Very well." Alfred said, gathering them again. "You will have some new ones placed in your drawers first thing in the morning tomorrow."

Bruce didn't reply and Alfred left. When the door slid close and Alfred was out, he smashed his fists on his table and felt his blood pump on his temples. This had to end. How much was he going to take, for one of Circe's stupid experiments?

Upstairs, Alfred dialed the number of the undergarment tailor and laughed a bit, under his well-combed moustache. This was getting too funny for him not to enjoy.

 ***Killer Frost is an ice-villain who survives by 'sucking' the heat out of other beings.**

 **Also, Diana used the sensor quite a lot, because, unlike Bruce, she hasn't gotten used to the smoke bombs yet.**

 **Next up is a funnier chapter, I promise. And then the fic doesn't have much to end! I told you it's supposed to be short.**

 **Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this draggy chapter! See you next time!***


	5. Chapter 5 - Flat Shoes Sexism and Sl

***Greetings, readers! As always, I'm opening the note with a big 'thank you' for your reviews and for reading this. Knowing that you like it means absolutely everything to me and I can't find the words to make you know how much I appreciated every little comment, or even a simple follow/fav. So, I hope you enjoy this one too and you'll be hearing from me in the end, again! Happy reading!***

 **CHAPTER FIVE - FLAT SHOES SEXISM AND A SLAUGHTERED BALLGOWN**

Diana sat on the black leather chair and span around a bit. It really was made to fit Bruce's body perfectly. "Still trying to burn it with your stare?" She called.

Bruce had been standing in front of the hung dress for some solid minutes, one hand folded over his chest, one hand over his mouth and chin in thought. He tried to put his thoughts in order, but they just kept flying all over the place. The dress, from what he saw, was definitely not too revealing or too extravagant or anything too flashy, but the amount of uneasiness he felt only by looking at it made him want to run as far away as possible. Bras, he could do. Braids, he could do. Accessories and tiaras, he could do. But ball gowns? Not so sure.

"Look. I'm going to head up to Alfred to get ready. I'll leave you get used to the idea of the dress, alright?" She said, getting up from the chair in front of the Batcave's monitors. As she climbed the last of the stairs, she turned around and saw Bruce shaking his head and pressing the bridge of his nose. Smiling, she exited the Cave through the clock-door and went to find Alfred.

"So, Princess." The butler said once they were entering the main bedroom. "I figured we should go with the classic black tuxedo."

"I was thinking..."

"Yes?"

"That maybe we should spice it up a bit."

Alfred arched an eyebrow. "'Spice it up'? In what way?"

"Nothing too radical, don't worry. But maybe we could add a little bit of color..."

A few minutes later, as Alfred was buttoning up the vest they had chosen, the door was pushed open and in stormed Dick Grayson, in a charcoal tuxedo. "Well, well! If this isn't a stylistic upgrade for the Wayne heir..." He said smiling.

Diana smiled back. "How are you, Dick?"

"I'm alright! Just came to prepare you for the ball."

"Prepare me for what?"

"Oh, Diana..." He said with a smug look. "You're representing Bruce Wayne. We couldn't possibly let you go and embarrass us without knowing the people you're supposed to..."

Diana's eyebrows were lifted. "Oh! Right, right. Please, do instruct me then."

"You are aware, of course, of Lucius Fox and the board members."

"Yes, I think I can recall all of them." Diana said, making a mental note of the people she had to remember for a cyber-conference she, in the position of Bruce, had to attend. Bruce had been connected with an earpiece to her and told her what to say and when and so the matter had been resolved then.

"So, moving on, here are the people you know and that have been invited." He handed her some photos.

On the first one, Diana saw a young, blonde woman and two blonde men by her side. "Oh." Alfred said, taking a look. "Princess Anya and Princes Dimitri and Jonas."

"You know them?!" Diana wondered.

"Of course. We had them here for dinner once. They insisted on speaking with the head of Wayne Enterprises before making a rather generous investment."

"Oh..." Diana arched an eyebrow.

"Bruce wasn't too excited about it though but, anyway, you should greet them if you see them."

"Yes, okay." Diana went on to the next photo of two old, Japanese men with white hair.

"Mr. Kashimoto on the right and Mr. Yamazaki on the left. Representatives of the Yamazaki company throughout the globe." Diana flipped another photo. "Claire Dupont. French Minister of Foreign Relations." Another. "This here, is the Smith family. From right to left, John, Pete, Mary, George, Elias, Justine, Max and Maxine. Don't know if all them will show up, but better safe than sorry."

Diana frowned as she felt the weight of the photos in her hands. There was no way she could remember all of those!

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

Diana slowly and carefully descended the stairs of the Batcave. Bruce, as she had guessed, was sitting in front of the monitors. The dress, she noticed, wasn't where she had left, so he must have put it on.

"Can I see it?" She said, approaching. The chair span slowly around and a solemn Bruce appeared. His face was the face of someone who had been betrayed by everything he held dear, and who had also betrayed what he held dear in his turn. The rest of his body, though, was into a wonderful dark blue and black gown.

"Come on, stand up."

Bruce slowly took a step and stood up, the bottom of the dress falling across the floor, as it was a bit too long for a barefoot Diana body.

Diana marveled at how amazing the dress looked on her. Up until the top of the breast, it was of a matte, lush fabric. From the breast and up, a dark-blue tulle reached around the neck and went down the arms as sleeves. The dress' color was a dark shade of blue too, that gradually turned black as the fabric went down. It was embroidered with small brilliants that became denser at the bottom, resembling the image of a star-lit night-sky. "You are so...pretty in this!"

"Yes." Bruce said. "Pretty is all I've ever wanted to be in my life."

"Now, we need to do your hair and makeup."

"What is this, some sort of pageant event? I don't need to have makeup."

"Yes, you do. I must bring out my good features and that's what makeup does. I need to look radiant."

"You do look radiant even without it."

"Thanks...but we're still going to have you made-up."

"Why? I just told you you-"

"I'm not doing make-up for you, I'm doing it for me. Come on now, we agreed. You let me do this and I'll wear the Bat-suit from now on."

Thinking about how he wouldn't have to see his body in any more ridiculous 'summery' outfits, he sighed and Diana smiled, heading for her bag.

"By the way..." Bruce said, upon watching her walk, "what's this new combination?"

"Oh, this?" Diana said, taking a look at her suit. "Well, I thought that maybe it was time for Bruce Wayne to have some color in his social appearances."

He inspected the tuxedo. They had kept the classic black pants, shoes and jacket, and the typical white shirt. The vest and the tie, though, were burgundy, and he noticed that the cufflinks were platinum with some dark red gemstones too. "Hm..."

"What, is it that bad?"

He half-smiled. "I think I like it."

"I'm glad." She smiled back, flipping an eye-shadow case open. "Now, don't move."

And he didn't, till his torture was over. He didn't understand what she was doing. He felt many things being pushed on his eyelids and his eyebrows and the rest of his face too. At times, she'd ask him to open his eyes and look up or look down or something, and he'd obey, trying not to look at his own face, concentrating on putting some sort of beauty product on somebody else. It was just too bizarre.

He didn't even move when she tried to apply mascara –that, he could recognize- and that was solely because of his strong effort to suppress his reflexes telling him to close his eyes to shield from that threatening black thing. And boy did that thing feel weird on his eyelashes.

When that part was luckily done and over with, Diana was quick in putting the long, black hair in an elegant bun at the bottom of his head. For that, he was truly grateful; leaving the hair down always bothered him. She finished with giving him a pair of diamond earrings to wear.

"Thanks for being so cooperative." Bruce simply nodded. "I hope the heels won't be too much for you."

Bruce arched an eyebrow. "They won't be too much, because there won't be any at all."

"But they're completing the outfit."

"Diana, my feet are barely visible through this dress."

"It's on purpose a bit too long, so that it'll be just right with the heels!"

"I'll just hold it when I walk. Problem solved."

"Fine. As you want. I won't torture you anymore." She let him have his way with no further struggle; she knew heels were no easy thing to master, and they didn't have enough time. He'd probably make a fool of herself if he tried to walk in heels in his body and no practice at all.

Bruce smiled ever-so-lightly and went on with putting on a pair of black ballerinas he had ordered with his boots back then- just in case. Diana watched him move to the stairs, trying to find a way to hold the excess fabric well. She grinned.

"I'll flirt you _so much_ when we get there."

Bruce simply turned his head over his shoulder a bit, smiling mischievously and winking. "I'd like to see you try."

Diana wished she could get to see this side of him more often.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

So as not to raise any suspicion, they had arranged two limousines to take them to the venue. Diana and Dick, as the Wayne family, would arrive first, and Bruce was to arrive some minutes later.

Camera flashes welcomed them as they exited the limousine. The celebratory ball for one of the most awaited peace treaties was obviously going to be a big deal and, well, Bruce Wayne was himself a big deal on his own, so the combination was something all the reporters wanted to capture. Diana made sure to smile slightly, making sure not to give her own, big, hearty smile through another person's face in public. Especially when everyone was watching. Dick smirked by his side and they walked to the entrance, giving a few typical, diplomatic answers to the reporters' questions on Wayne Enterprises' position on the treaty and the situation. Dick and she had rehearsed them multiple times in the limousine.

They gave the guard their invitations and entered. Diana admired the spacious hall, decorated with art pieces inspired by the war they stopped with the treaty, and the impressive, glass dome on the top. She made sure not to make many facial expressions, though.

"Hello there, Mr. Wayne." She heard someone call, someone with a heavy stress on the 'r', and turned around.

"If this isn't Princess Anya.." She said, as the blonde royal came to her mind immediately.

"How have you been? We have not spoken in a long time!"

"Busy, as you know. Where are Princes Jonas and Dimitri?" She asked, with a cold politeness.

"Not here!" She said and laughed. Her laugh was a very weird sound, too high-pitched and unusual for her taste.

"Diplomacy issues, I assume?"

"You could say. So, when are we going to have another fantastic dinner, Mr. _Bruce_?" Her tone was obviously flirty but Diana, refraining from arching an eyebrow at her, remained contained.

"I do not know when my schedule will allow it. Now, if you forgive me, I am waiting for someone."

"O-Oh, yes, okay... It was good seeing you again, Mr. Wayne.."

Diana bowed her head lightly and turned around.

Dick approached her and handed her a drink. "Left you alone for just a moment, and you started turning girls away already..."

"I didn't know I was supposed to accept everybody's advances..." Diana replied ironically.

"Nah, of course. Anya's always been a little too keen on Bruce. We've turned dinner invitations down three times already. He doesn't like her much."

"Can't see why..."

Dick huffed and half-smiled, liking how protective of Bruce's 'singleness' she seemed. He always knew Bruce had a softer side for the Amazonian Princess, but seeing it being mutual in front of his eyes, was something else. He liked it.

Not many minutes later, and after greeting a couple of people that luckily Dick remembered, they noticed a commotion by the entrance, and as curiosity took over, they headed over there.

Diana half-smiled as she watched Bruce struggle a bit with exiting the limousine, but standing proudly when he managed to do so. He placed his hands on his waist and smiled widely for the cameras. Diana's eyes widened as he seemed to play the part a little too well; he reenacted her stance and expressions so faithfully. She heard Dick mumble something along the lines of 'Damn, Dad's way too pretty' and she huffed.

Bruce, with notable grace, tugged at one side of the dress, lifting it up and made some steps to the entrance. The reporters were unbelievably taken aback when they realized that he-she, for them, was actually wearing a pair of simple, flat ballerinas and Bruce stopped midway, frowning, as the questions of the reporters on the shoes were getting too many, and too annoying, and his patience had grown thin these days.

"Excuse me!" He said and they all stopped speaking, as they started taking notes of her answers, and many, many photos. "Why are you all so surprised with the choice of my footwear?"

Diana and Dick frowned and looked at each other. What was he doing?

"Don't I have the right to wear what I want? Don't I have the right to comfortable shoes? Are you asking the same things at the men coming through?" He could hear no clear answers from the so-called journalists. "I am insulted. I fought too hard for this treaty, only to come here and be remembered and asked about the shoes I wore. You should all be ashamed." With that he resumed walking. Plenty of questions bombarded his ears, but he ignored them. He handed his invitation at the guard, and he opened the door. Before entering, he turned to the press and said "I'll answer your questions when you stop being so obviously sexist. Thank you."

When he came inside, welcomed again not by the cameras, but the curious looks of the people inside, he didn't know how to feel. The men were all looking at her weirdly. Most of the women though, were smiling at him and he, trying to stay in Diana's shoes, smiled to them all and walked further inside.

Diana and Dick approached and he could see, even through his own face, Diana beaming with pride.

"If we weren't in such crowded place," Diana whispered when they came close, "I would have run and given you a hug."

Dick laughed and Bruce gave them a small smile. "They shouldn't have messed with my shoes."

"Oh, my." Dick said, focusing on something at the other side of the hall. "I'm sorry, I'll be back later." He handed his drink to Bruce and stormed off.

"What happened?" Diana asked. Bruce simply smirked.

"He spotted an old acquaintance."

Diana saw him make his towards a stunning, dark-skinned girl in a red gown. "Oh, I see..."

"Did you greet any of _your_ old acquaintances?"

Diana took a sip from her glass. "As a matter of fact, yes. Dick and I greeted, if I recall the names correctly, Mrs. Waller and Mr. Lee, and I had a rather pleasant encounter with Princess Anya herself."

"That's why she's been staring at me like this, then."

Diana half-smiled. "What can I say, a little good, old Wayne charm can go a long way."

"Diana."

"Yes?"

"If she comes closer, introduce me to her."

Diana arched an eyebrow. "What for?"

"So that she never calls us again..." Bruce said mischievously and Diana smiled.

"Alright..."

"One piece of advice."

"Yes?"

"You really should go greet those people over there." Bruce said, pointing with his eyes at a pair of gentlemen near the bar.

Diana tried to remember their names. "That's the Minister of Economy and that's..."

"Senator Hardy. Both generous donators to the Wayne Hospices around Gotham. Just go greet and thank them. The typical."

Diana nodded. "As you wish. I'll be back."

Bruce watched her go, relieved at the fact that she was walking without swinging her hips too much, like she had done the first days. Just as he was about to approach the buffet, a tall man came to his side.

"A bold statement you made there, Miss Wonder Woman." He said. "I admire your courage."

"It's hardly courage, pointing out the obvious." Bruce replied, angrily noticing how the man was looking at him like he was some kind of exotic candy.

Truth be told, yes, it was an admirable sight but it didn't stop being another person. He was of the opinion, that anybody could admire the looks of a person, as long as it was done discretely and respectfully. He was well aware how appearances, the first thing a person's sense caught of somebody else, shaped first impressions, but acknowledging that someone is attractive and staring as if that someone is just a piece of meat were two completely different things. Bruce turned his look on his body, examining it. "Do I have something weird on me?"

The man lifted his eyes. "Oh, no, no, it's just, um, your dress. It's fantastic."

"Thanks." He replied, arching an eyebrow.

"Let me put you out of your misery, Wonder Woman." He heard another man say, coming from behind her and placing his hand on his waist. "This man over here has the amazing talent of boring every woman to death."

Bruce snatched his hand and shoved it back onto its owner. "Seems like you both have this talent." He retorted.

"I'm sorry if I offended you with my gesture." The newcomer said. "I was merely trying to be friendly."

"Forgive my brother." The other guy said. "He doesn't know how to behave well in front of ladies like you."

"It runs in the family, I suppose." Bruce spat, readying his exit.

The first man half-smiled. "I like feisty women."

"Too bad 'feisty' women can't say the same about you."

Both of them laughed until they heard someone clear the throat behind them. Bruce rolled his eyes; not another one!

Strutting proudly, Diana came through the pushy "suitors" and stretched her hand. "May I have this dance?"

"Oh, please." Bruce said, half-smiling, remembering the last time this happened. Diana drew him away and when they were in the middle of the hall, she turned around and waited for Bruce to make his move.

He smirked at her, knowing that he was supposed to follow in the dance, and not lead. Casually, as many people were observing them, he placed his hands on Diana's wide shoulders and felt like laughing at how surreal this was. Diana accordingly put her hand on his waist and took a step forward. Bruce, out of habit, almost missed the following step of the dame, but caught up to it soon enough; she was, luckily, good at leading them too and the moves of the dance were simple.

"Oh, how the tables have turned." Diana said, smiling.

"Indeed..."

"So, how was it? Did you...flirt with them alright?"

"Let's just say that I understand why you, Amazons, hate men."

"I don't really hate men. At least not all of them, Mr. Wayne..."

"Good to hear that."

Dick, with that girl he was going to greet before, soon joined them on the 'dancefloor'. At a turn, Bruce's and Dick's eyes met, and Dick mouthed 'you're _so_ rocking this'. Bruce didn't know what to make of that.

Diana deeply enjoyed the evening so far. And dancing, it felt just like it did when they were in their own bodies, that other time. It felt...right. To be there with each other, enjoying something just outside the League's duties, having fun. Diana made a promise with herself, to try, as hard as she could, to make their fun a little bit more...reoccurring than once every two years. And Hera knew she pulled through everything she put her mind into.

"Hey, Bruce..." She said, going for a long eye-to-eye stare.

"Yes?"

Diana focused on what she could find of Bruce in her own eyes. "Are you feeling _something_ now?"

Bruce arched his eyebrow. "Meaning?"

"Hm...Let's do a turn." Diana pushed him slightly, signaling him for the move. Bruce prayed that he wouldn't mess it up, trying to process what Diana wanted. He span away, slightly stretching his hand –as he recalled Diana doing in their last dance every time he replayed the scene in his head- and span back around, as Diana led him, with his back on her chest. Bruce tensed up for some reason.

Diana, now being somewhat taller than Bruce, leaned over his tulle-covered shoulder. "Now do you feel _something_?"

"Yes, anger!" Bruce said loudly and broke their dance off, as the glass dome over the heads came crushing down. Instinctively, he pushed Diana down and covered her.

"You know I don't need your cover right now, right?" Diana mumbled, shutting her eyes for any incoming shards. The Wayne suits were all specifically designed to withstand knife cuts and even some sort of bullets.

Bruce ignored her and when the glass stopped falling, he stood up. They really needed to stop going to places with glass ceilings. It never went well.

Sliding down on their grappling hooks, about twenty men all dressed in black commando suits, with their faces covered, came inside. They were all armed. Diana and Dick, who were still in cover as simple humans, crossed eyes and nodded to each other. They knew how to act on such circumstances.

The men pointed their guns at the guests on the floor and their leader, as it figured, lifted his gun up and spoke, as everyone in the room had gone silent.

"You celebrate," the man said, with a heavy accent, "a peace that is against the will of my people! You aren't letting us claim what is ours!" As he spoke, Diana and Dick crawled away, approaching the buffet.

"The treaty," Bruce shouted, "offered you peace! Why would you want to prolong the suffering of your people?" He tried to resonate with him, knowing it would bear no results. He was buying Diana and Dick some time; he knew he couldn't take on twenty hostage-holding men on his own and not have some casualties.

"My people will only be served, when we have our revenge!"

"Revenge on what? A mindless, century-long vendetta?"

"You know nothing about it, _Wonder Woman._ You shouldn't speak."

"You," Bruce said, getting fired up, "won't tell me what to do! I'll have you silenced _forever_!"

"I'd like to see you try, _woman."_

And that was when Bruce lost it. He'd had enough tonight.

Diana and Dick grabbed whatever sharp object they could find and yelled, as they threw them straight to the necks of some of the invaders. They didn't know if they actually got anyone well –the knives were hardly sharp at all, and they weren't supposed to reveal their skills so easily in public eye. Their yelling though, and the knives flying were enough for them to distract the rest of the commandos. The security guards from outside managed to get a clear shot on three of them, and three hostages cried out, as they saw the guns pointed at them fall down.

Bruce had flown straight to the leader and planted a very solid punch on his face, throwing him several meters away. He followed him there and took the weapon out of his hand, smashing it on his chin and rendering him unconscious. Losing no time, he threw the weapon on a commando going for an old man, and he fell down. Jumping up, Bruce flew again and gathered the attention of all the rest of the standing invaders. They started shooting at him but he managed to reflect most of the bullets with the bracelets. In one swift movement, he dived down and punched another one square on the chest. The rest of them came at him but soon, at a pace not even Dick and Diana could keep up with, they were all thrown away, slamming at the walls and falling down bloody and distorted. Not a single person in the room wasn't left in a frightful awe about Wonder Woman's brunt; those commandos had a face of pure horror the moment they realized what they were up against. In the end, Bruce stood there in the middle, disheveled, in a ripped ball gown, but victorious none the less. The security guards had already entered the hall and confined the fainted extremists. People around started getting up and clapped for Wonder Woman. Bruce smiled a bit turned to see Diana and Dick nodding at him in approval. Diana walked up to him, carrying a glass of vodka. Bruce drank it all up.

"Thanks." He said, wiping his lips and getting some lipstick smudged on his hand.

"You were great." Diana complimented and her commentary was seconded by many others coming up to them.

"Thank you, Wonder Woman!" "You saved us!" "You truly are wonderful!"

"But, Mr. Wayne!" The Minister of Economy said, wide-eyed. "How did you manage to throw those knives so precisely?"

"Oh, did I?" Diana said, keeping her cool.

"Yes!" A lady said. "You and your adoptive son almost got everyone with those!"

"Well, we have been taking some self-defense classes." Diana said, coming up with the most plausible excuse. "We thought it...wise to be able to help should anything happened. The fact that we hit our targets was purely a coincidence, maybe because of the adrenaline that was rushing through all of us. The true hero was Wonder Woman, and she is the one you should all-Where is she?"

As a matter of fact, when everyone's attention was focused on him, Diana should have realized that Bruce would pull off something so Batman-y. Maybe he had enough of public exposure for a day.

"A true hero indeed." Diana went on. "Didn't even stay to hear your thank-yous. She doesn't need them." She had noticed, of course, that the reporters had already stormed inside and kept track of everything they said. "Now, if you'll excuse us, my son and I will be leaving. We've had enough for tonight." She nodded at Dick and they made their way outside, followed by plenty of camera clicks.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

"Thanks again, Alfred!" Diana shouted waving before heading inside her jet. She had changed back into her own clothes and left the tux back at its rightful owners. Bruce, as she guessed, was in the cave, but she thought it better to leave him alone for tonight. It had been quite enough of a replica of their other night and, well, she wanted to have more original memories from now on, starting from tomorrow.

Bruce, from down below, listened as the jet took off. He was back into his pajamas and ready to spend some hours in front of his monitors. He'd had enough public action for one night, even for the standards of Wonder Woman. As he took a seat on his leather chair, he noticed a small plastic bottle on his desk, along with a note. He took the note in his hands.

" _Don't forget to remove your makeup before sleeping! Use this lotion with some cotton until it's all gone and then wash your face. Nighty night!"_

He opened a drawer of his desk, where the first-aid supplies were located and took out some cotton. He applied some lotion on it, guessing on the quantity and reluctantly approached it to his right eye. He started rubbing the cotton with circular movements, feeling the mascara coming off. It was a nice feeling, to finally remove all that from his face.

Not for long though. His eye started feeling like it was burning and he could practically feel it getting red. He put the cotton down and tears came running down from his right eye, cleansing it from the substance. Taking a look at this reflection on the monitor, he resembled Harley Quinn, he thought, with a large black smudge all over his eye. How much more lotion would it take for it to come off?!

He took the note in his hands again and flipped it back. As he guessed, Diana had left him a PS. _"PS. It might sting just a bit."_

"Just a bit..." He mumbled to himself, grabbing another cotton piece and starting with the other eye, letting his right one calm down.

The Bat Cave's door opened up and down came Alfred. He paid no attention to what Bruce was doing and headed for the dress, left clumsily on a working bench.

"Should we send it to the tailor for repairs, sir?"

"Mm, what?" Bruce asked, turning around on his chair.

"Oh, Good Lord, sir." Alfred said, upon seeing him like that. "And I thought we skipped your goth phase when you were a teenager."

"Alfred..."

"I am sorry, sir. It's just that I've never seen you resemble a raccoon so much before."

"Alfred!"

"And I've seen you with both eyes black from bruises. Imagine!" Alfred laughed a bit.

"What do you want?"

"I think we should repair this dress for Miss Diana. It seems quite expensive, I bet she would like it back."

"Yes. Do that."

"She didn't say anything, of course." Alfred kept babbling on. "She's such a nice woman, don't you think, sir?"

"Mm-hm."

Alfred gave him a good, long side-glance, as he turned around on his chair again. He didn't know how to put it, really, but he had a hunch that when his master would get his body back, he wouldn't be the same. And that wasn't necessarily bad, Alfred thought. In fact, if he turned out correct, which he usually did, it wouldn't be bad at all...

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

Diana cursed loudly in Greek, standing in front of her bathroom's mirror. Shaving a face really was much more difficult than shaving legs. She was quite dexterous with sharp things, but this really wasn't her piece of cake. Only one minute into shaving, and after she had done the preparation perfectly, with all the necessary foams and gels, and she had two small cuts onto her chin. Two long blood trails ran down her muscular neck and she washed them away every now and then, but as she kept on shaving, more and more kept forming, until the sink and the razor and her hands were all a bloody mess.

"Damn it all..." She mumbled and washed her face off. She observed her face; it was hardly a decent shave. Many spots were left unshaved and the rest of the skin seemed very sensitive and ready to bleed more. Not wanting to continue doing this this late into the night, she decided to continue in the morning.

Now, she needed her beauty sleep. Tomorrow was a big day.

 ***As I'm thinking it, this fic is going to last a little longer! I hope you're not finding it too boring!**

 **I enjoyed writing about their ball and I really hoped you liked it! Please leave me a comment down below. Thanks for reading and sorry for any unnoticed typos!***


	6. Chapter 6 - Random Brewing and Webcam

***A/N: It's been such a long time, WonderBat people! I'm so so so so sorry for being THIS late for the chapter, but you need to excuse me. My summer has been as hectic as it could and I couldn't find myself some time to write. But I'm back now, and thank you for waiting patiently. ^^ As always, thanks for supporting this and I hope you enjoy it. Happy reading!***

 **CHAPTER SIX – RANDOM BREWING AND WEBCAM COVERS**

Diana was happy to realize that she had some hour to spare before their appointment. It had been a long time since she last found some time during the day to just relax around her place.

Smiling to herself, she turned her computer on and mechanically, clicked the 'play' button to her music playlist. Some soft strumming on a guitar made her smile even more; she had missed listening to music. Turning the volume somewhat up, she got off the chair and fell on her unmade bed. Humming lowly to the first lyrics, she grabbed the notepad she had left on her bedside table and started scribbling something on the list of 'Things I need to buy for this body'. As the song kept going, Diana realized that her singing really sounded unfamiliar to her ears.

Reasonable, she thought. She had gotten used to Bruce's voice coming from her by now –several days have gone by, after all- and Bruce's voice in general wasn't something unfamiliar to her. But his _singing_ voice was something completely different. Thinking about it, she had never heard him sing before, not even hum.

"This will be interesting…" She mumbled before clearing her throat and waiting for the chorus to begin. She took a deep breath and once the song went into its climax, she kept singing along, really focusing on how she sounded. Surprised would be an understatement on how she felt.

His voice had a very characteristic bass tone. On high notes it felt somewhat 'nosey' but on the lows and the humming, it was golden. Diana wouldn't miss such an opportunity, of course. Springing up from the bed, she ran to the computer and searched for some old songs she thought would fit this new voice perfectly. She grinned widely upon finding the versions she wanted and got up again. She put on the Batman mask and sat back down, opening up the webcam program. In a few clicks, she was ready to start recording and couldn't stop grinning at how lucky she felt to be able to keep a proper record of Bruce's singing ability. And all for her own two eyes to see, and her own two ears to enjoy for now.

The video started recording, she tapped her feet to the beat and got ready to sing. She knew she wouldn't go as high as the original singer, but do her own unique cover of the song that would suit her new vocal chords better.

" _There is a house in New Orleans… They call the Rising Sun. And it's been the ruin of many a poor boy, and God I know I'm one…"_

Putting on her headphones, she played the video she recorded. For using no professional equipment, the result was quite good indeed. In fact, it was more than 'quite good'; Bruce was really talented vocally and, at long last, she had discovered it. Wasting no time, she went on to the second song. If she skipped any second takes –it wasn't like she was going to publish them anywhere to need to make sure everything looked perfect, she could have recorded at least six before her time to leave came.

The music started playing once again and Diana started singing.

" _I am the passenger…And I ride and I ride, I ride through the city's backside…"_

-OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO-

The door slid open once Diana arrived, and she entered the chemistry department. She never really wandered around those labs; it wasn't her field of expertise and she didn't really have any business around those corridors with the weird machinery and the peculiar tubes, filled with liquids of all sorts.

Being careful not to knock anything down –her new silhouette was so much bulkier than her own- she approached the back room and entered it. Predictably enough, Bruce was already there, discussing with Zatana.

"Welcome, Diana." Zatana greeted.

"Hey." Diana greeted back, taking a look at a number of vials placed on the desk by Zatana's side. "Are we ready?"

"I suppose." The sorceress replied. "Unfortunately, as I've been telling Batman, we couldn't come up with a solid antidote for the potion. Its structure was too complicated to tell which ingredient was key and how to reverse it."

"…So…"

"So we brewed several 'antidotes', focusing on one ingredient at a time and adjusting the rest. Potions are such an old technique, guys, and no one ever bothers with those anymore. Circe, however, is old-school so I can tell why she likes them."

Diana rolled her eyes. "We're basically just hoping one of those miraculously works, right?"

"In a way. We already tried them out on some test subjects and ruled out a few recipes. We can't really predict how those will affect human beings but they are safe at least. I have some immediate-effect-removal serum with me, or, the 'I messed up but it's not too late' potion as I like to call it." She grinned goofily.

Bruce shook his head. "Let's get this over with. Maybe our salvation is inside one of those."

"But hold on a second." Diana said, rubbing her throat for a second. Bruce noticed how his voice faltered for a moment and wondered if Diana had been doing anything suspicious. "When the accident happened, I didn't drink the potion. I was just soaked in it."

Zatana shook her hand. "It works in the same way. If you had drunk it instead, but touched Batman afterwards, it would have been the same. The potion needs physical contact between the subjects, not necessarily with it on their actual skin."

"I see. Alright."

"And before you ask, we're not having you try the original potion again because of its formula. It was specifically brewed to forbid the circular exchange of souls. AKA, once you've been changed with this, you can change bodies with another person again, but not with the one you switched bodies in the first place."

"Perfect." Diana said ironically.

"Can we start now." Batman urged.

"Yes, yes…" Zatana handed Bruce a vial with a clear liquid. "Trial number one. Take a sip and then pass it on."

Bruce brought the vial to his lips and drunk some, trying to ignore the sour taste that burned his tongue. He handed it to Diana, who couldn't help but cringe at its taste a little. "Now touch." Zatana ordered. Diana took one of the Batsuit's –she had given a promise to Bruce, after all- gloves off and stretched her hand. Bruce didn't know why he hesitated at first but brought his hand closer until their fingers touched. Starting from where they had touched, they watched as Bruce's skin darkened and Diana's lightened.

"I don't think this is right…" Diana mumbled, withrdrawing her hand.

Zatana lifted her eyebrows as she realized what was going on, taking a look at the eyes on Batman's original body. "Here, drink." She said, handing them a big glass of a blue liquid, with two straws. Diana and Bruce both quickly approached the glass, taking a sip from the straws and soon, everything was back to normal.

"Knew we'd need much of this…" Zatana mumbled, placing the glass back on the desk. "So, apparently, this is a color exchange potion. Your hair, eyes and skin were going to shift colors." She marked 'color exchange' on the label.

"Not very useful." Diana said, losing most of her hopes for the endeavors to follow.

"Not very useful to you, but cosmetically speaking, this is certainly promising!"

Bruce sighed. "On to the next please."

"Here." She handed them a vial with a thick, burgundy liquid inside. "Bottoms up."

Bruce took a sip; this one was actually sweet. Diana finished it up and then they touched again. Both immediately brought their hands to the sides of their heads, cringing and growling in discomfort.

"What is this migraine?!" Diana said through her teeth.

Bruce tried to control his thoughts in the midst of his head going crazy. The only thing he seemed to realize is that…he remembered some scenes. But when did he ever witness Hippolyta training him in sword fights? When did he go to the movies with Wally West? When did he kiss…himself in a diner corner?!

Frantic at the thought that Diana's mind was probably being filled with his memories too, he lunged at the glass with the blue serum and brought it to Diana. "Drink!" Diana obeyed and took a generous sip with him. Instantly, the migraine stopped and Bruce found himself in a weird haze. He remembered that he had remembered Diana's memories, but he had no…memory of the memories themselves. He felt relieved, knowing that Diana forgot what she had seen from his memories too.

"What happened?!" Zatana asked, grabbing the glass back.

"We were sharing our memories." Diana replied and Bruce nodded –so she had understood.

"Oh… It must have been the coral dust. I see…" She marked the label again. "Well, only one more left."

Diana sighed. "Let's see…"

She handed them a vial with a fluorescent blue liquid. "As you see, this resembles the one you took a bath into, Diana. We've only changed one of the ingredients, but it seemed kind of important. I just hope it works!" Smiling, she gave Bruce the vial again and crossed her fingers, winking at Diana.

Bruce took a sip, Diana did too and they touched hands once again. They waited for some minutes in silence.

"Feeling any different?" The sorceress asked.

"Not really…" Diana said.

"Me neither." Bruce followed, folding his hands.

Zatana sighed. "Seems like we just made the potion useless by altering that ingredient, then. I'm sorry for not having made something better for you…"

Diana exhaled slowly. "It's…fine. You'll figure it out, right? You're not giving up…"

"Of course not! We can't let two top-notch Leaguers live like that. We'll keep brewing things. As we speak, Doctor Fate is off to research soul potion brewing. I bet he won't come back empty-handed. Till then," she turned her eyes to Bruce's stormy face, "please keep being patient and we will sort everything out."

Diana nodded and Bruce simply stood up and walked to the door. "Thanks!" Diana mumbled as they exited.

"There goes another hole in the water." She said, coughing dryly. The labs' grey corridors seemed to be reflecting her mood perfectly. Bruce remained silent, having his eyebrows furrowed and his gaze pinned forward. "Don't discourage yourself, though. We will sort it all out eventually…I think."

"Why didn't you grab the removal serum when you understood what was going on with our memories?" He asked gloomily, changing subject.

"Maybe my reflexes aren't as quick as yours…"

Bruce flashed her an examining side-glance. Even through his face, he could understand her expression; that specific small smile that signaled that she meant much more than she said. Bruce wasn't ready to confront her about it, though. Some other time.

"I'm heading back to Gotham." Bruce announced once they exited the labs.

Diana shrugged. "We'll talk later."

With that, Bruce span around and left the opposite way.

Diana walked slowly back to the main Tower, wishing she could have kept those memories of Bruce that she saw. They would have given her such a better perspective on the man of mysteries that she had to deal with. She would get to understand him so much more. But, alas, he just had to get defensive so quickly…

"Gee, Princess, I hope the bat-body doesn't make _you_ bat-broody too…" Flash said, catching her up at the corridors. "Where's your mind wandering?"

"Ugh it's nothing, Flash. I was just absent-minded."

"Hey…" He nudged her, smiling playfully. "It's the last Friday of the month today…"

"Oh! I almost forgot!"

"Yeah, makes sense. It's a shame you won't be able to attend. I mean, in this situation, it's just-"

Diana smirked at a small idea popping up. "Why, I think I might join you."

Flash's eyebrows shot up. "You're not kidding?!"

"Don't think so. So, see you tonight, then?"

Flash smiled from one ear to the other. "You bet! It's going to a-we-some!"

Diana laughed and turned around to head back to her room. There was something she needed to do.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

"And use your headphones, okay?"

" _Yes, of course, Princess. Thank you incredibly much for sharing this all with me."_

"No problem, Alfred. I figured you'd never see something like this otherwise and I know it's something…precious."

" _Most definitely, Princess. I am so very glad we two can understand each other. Thank you again."_

"Good night!"

" _Good night."_

Diana smiled to herself, hanging up and heading to her wardrobe. What can you wear to a karaoke night and that goes with a black bat mask?

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

Bruce looked at Alfred from the corner of his eyes. His loyal butler was unusually cheerful today.

"Did any news arrive?" He asked, grabbing the fork that Alfred had placed by the side of his full plate.

"News concerning what, sir?"

Bruce shrugged. "Anything, I suppose. You're suspiciously joyful."

Alfred half-smiled. "We can't all be gloomy in this house, Master Bruce. So, please, let me enjoy my good mood before something makes it fowl again."

"…Alright."

Bruce carried on eating, observing Alfred as he went about the kitchen, cleaning up. He was humming something.

" _I am the passenger…"_

 ***Karaoke night coming up, along with something quite major!**

 **This fic should come to an end eventually, right? :P**

 **I hope you enjoyed this. I planned to have the night in this chapter too, but I came up with something nice along the writing, so it will get to happen next time! Thanks for reading and thanks for your feedback!***


	7. Chapter 7 - The Backward Switch

***Hello, readers! Thanks to everybody that followed/faved/reviewed. It means the world to me. I hope you continue to like this as it goes. I don't have much to say this time, happy reading!***

 **CHAPTER SEVEN – THE BACKWARD SWITCH**

Bruce sat on the Manor's balcony, whiskey on hand, watching the almost-full moon come and go behind the intermittent clouds. He would need to go patrolling around Gotham in a while. Till then, he decided it was time to delve into some thoughts he had been ignoring for the past days, weeks or some, even for years.

The situation he was into was certainly hindering his life. For he was Bruce Wayne and the Batman, only that he...wasn't. For the whole world, he looked and sounded like Wonder Woman and nothing could convince anyone otherwise, since a very perky Bruce Wayne had been popping up here and there.

He sighed. He really disapproved of what Diana did to his image sometimes, but, deciding to be honest to himself, he realized that he wasn't scolding her as much as he could. If he wanted, he could have her act as serious as he desired. And the reason for that was...that Diana, most of the days, was the only lighted part in his otherwise shady life. Her strength, her confidence, her aura, her smile, all that. And, somehow, it radiated even through his own characteristics. That, Bruce couldn't lose. And that was why he didn't scold her that much. He really should punish himself for indulging her to that extent, but God knew he had a very big soft spot for her.

"No point in denying it, Bruce." He told himself, swallowing a mouthful of whiskey. He liked the way it burned its way down his throat.

And that damn attraction he felt. He could easily remember how he felt when they kissed –even for camouflage reasons, and how he wished, some nights, that his life wasn't what it was, and that he could just push her to a wall, tangle his fingers in her hair and make her his for the whole night. And it was obvious that it was mutual. Diana made it _very_ obvious.

He took a look at his glass and how the faint moonlight sparkled on his caramel-colored drink. And he wondered. What was holding him back?

Many things, he thought. But again... Maybe Alfred was right sometimes. He only had one life; this one. Maybe he could do something for his own sake every now and then. Maybe he should just go for it.

And his dream sphere burst when he observed his hand around the glass; how soft his skin looked, how perfectly almond-shaped his nails were and how nice his bracelets shone and shook his head. That was what was holding him back. He wasn't his damn self!

He would drive himself crazy over that. He wanted his old body back. Now.

And just like that, his eyesight turned hazy and his arms fell at his sides numb as he slipped out of consciousness and his whiskey glass shattered on the ground.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

"Fancy seeing _you_ here!" Black Canary said, opening the door to Flash's downtown apartment. "Didn't think you'd come, in your...situation."

"Nothing can hold me back from some good tunes!" Diana said smiling, wiping her feet on the doormat and entering.

Like every last Friday of the month, Flash had rearranged his furniture in a way to make space to set up his own small stage in the middle of the living room. A microphone, some speakers and a screen later, he had the setting for some amazing karaoke nights. Soon, lights and other equipment kept joining the set, as the weeks went on and their get-togethers for sing-alongs became fixed. Flash was particularly proud of those small parties he held monthly and it showed.

As Black Canary's and Green Arrow's wedding drew closer, they decided to commemorate the night to romantic songs and duets. The lighting was dim, the walls were decorated with hearts and the pizzas were cut in a heart-shape too. Diana giggled upon seeing it and grabbed a piece before going to take a seat next to Captain Marvel and Superman.

Flash ascended on the stage and tapped the microphone to make sure it was working. Diana always found it funny how he insisted that all the heroes that didn't show the face in crime-fighting should still wear their masks at the parties, for privacy protection, supposedly. The rest of outfit could be adjusted.

And so Flash, in his red headcover and some nice green pants, welcomed them to this special love party, proceeding to explain how the night would roll.

"Have you prepared something for today?" Clark asked, munching on some pizza.

"I might."

He arched an eyebrow. "Are you serious, Diana? I was joking!"

Diana smiled widely. "Why, we're not here for exhibiting our talents. We are here to just enjoy singing, regardless of the quality."

"Yes, but...you know."

"I want to have fun and I will. If I let myself be self-conscious about this situation every time it was an obstacle to something, I'd never step out of my apartment."

Clark half-smiled. "Alright then, Diana. Enjoy this."

"Oh I will..."

"And so," Flash wrapped up, "the night will end with a one-of-a-kind spectacle, as Wonder Woman will honor us with performing through Batman's body, one of her personal favorites!" Cheers echoed around and Diana laughed. "Let's get started!"

"Showtime!" Captain Marvel exclaimed, springing up, and climbed up the stage, as Supergirl started to walk towards it too. Diana, seeing Kara's super-tight black outfit and puffed up hair, giggled. She knew what was coming.

"Kara!" Captain Marvel said in awe, widening his eyes.

"Tell me about it, stud..." She replied, climbing up and the music started playing.

" _I got chills, they're multiplying... And I'm losing control!"_

OOO-OOO-OOO—OOO

Diana clapped enthusiastically at the end of Zatana's performance of 'I will always love you'. The sorceress bowed deeply and nodded at Diana to ascend. She took a deep breath and got off her seat as the guests clapped for her too now.

She stood in front of the microphone and looked at their faces; they were all so curious to hear what would come out of Batman's vocal chords. All but Zatana, of course. She already knew.

"I will be closing this amazing evening," she began, "on a romantic, but somewhat sadder note. It's a song that...means a lot to me, I hope you enjoy it and thank you for keeping all this a secret." She winked at the crowd and her friends and colleagues smiled. She nodded at Flash and her music began.

" _Am I blue?... Am I blue? Ain't these tears in my eyes, telling you?..."_

She watched as the majority of the guests gasped or widened their eyes in surprise.

" _Am I blue? You'd be too, if your schemes like your dreams done fell through..."_

Kara cupped her face in her hands. Flash couldn't stop smiling and Zatana nodded in understanding. Diana prepared her voice for the next part.

" _Was a time, I was her only one...Now I am the sad and lonely one...Oh, yes I am..."_

She realized her eyes, underneath the mask, were getting watery. She didn't expect for it to be this emotional to her but... it was the first time she actually heard Bruce's voice in this song. The song he had sung to get her free from Circe's hold. Oh, how ironic that this song was being sung when they were into another one of Circe's schemes...

" _Was I gay, till today? Now she's gone and we're through...Am I blue?... Was a time, I was her only one..._ "

Diana's eyesight became blurry. And no, it wasn't from the moving song. Something felt wrong. She stopped singing as she couldn't breathe anymore and stumbled back. The last thing she saw was Clark propelling himself off his chair and coming to hold her body as she fell to the ground.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

Bruce woke up in a haze. He couldn't focus on many things, but he did recognize some familiar faces around him. He also understood he was wearing his mask, but not his suit.

"Sit up, sit up." He heard Superman say, as they brought him to a seated position. "How are you feeling?"

"Where am I?" He asked, noticing, as his eyesight was clearing up, that he was wearing a pair of grey pants and a...light pink button-down shirt.

"Here, you just fainted." Flash replied. "Want some water?"

"Where's 'here'?" He asked agitated. The place –what seemed to be a kitsch monument of Valentine's Day- didn't ring any bells.

"My place! Come on Diana, get your head together. You're alright."

Bruce's brain's gears finally started working. He was...back in his body, only where Diana last took it. Subconsciously, he smiled saying, "I'm not Diana."

Zatana stepped in front, as many people moved away, giving space to Bruce to stand up. "Batman, is that you?!"

"Yes. Something reversed the potion."

Zatana grinned. "It was probably the last antidote we tried! I never gave you the removal serum since I thought it was just a useless concoction. It seems like it needed some time to act..."

"Good thing to have you back to normal!" Clark exclaimed, patting his friend on the shoulder. Bruce nodded lightly.

"What's all this?" He asked and watched as most of them bit their lips.

"Um, we were just celebrating our upcoming wedding." Green Arrow said.

Bruce raised an eyebrow, pointing at the stage. "With a play or something?"

"Uh, come on, Bats." Flash said. "This is for my stand-up comedy act! And for making some proper toasts. Diana loves my humour, that's why she always comes when I organize stuff like this." He smiled smugly. Bruce found his excuse hard to believe.

"Mmhm..."

"Come on now, don't spoil it for us." Superman intervened. "I bet you're more than happy to be back to your body, right?" The Kryptonian gave them one of his hearty smiles.

Bruce replied with a cold glance. "I'm going back now. Go on with your...wedding party."

"Thanks..." Black Canary retorted.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

Bruce rubbed his hands as he went through the Manor's entrance, carrying his cape and mask on his arm. Other than some shaving cuts on the sides of his jaw, his body seemed to be in an excellent condition. His skin was much softer than before, as were his lips and his hair too. He betted Diana had spent much time trying to rub all kinds of stuff around to make them all so smooth and smiled to himself. He felt truly amazing.

"Back are you, Master Bruce?" Alfred greeted from the entrance hall. Bruce could make out a faint smile under his moustache. He was happy as well.

"In two senses, yes."

"I am glad. I hope you don't mind –which you don't- but since Princess Diana came back to her own body, which was at the balcony, I invited her to stay for some dinner with me."

"It was the natural thing to do, Alfred."

"Should I prepare another dining set for you, sir, or will you not honor us with your presence tonight?"

"I will."

"Perfect. Join the Princess, then, and I will bring our dinner in a jiffy." Bruce half-smiled. Alfred only ever used the word 'jiffy' when he was ecstatic.

He walked inside the dining room and found Diana, with her arms folded, looking at him intensely. A playful grin was decorating her face. "Welcome home."

Bruce was thrilled to be able to see her as she was, and not when he was looking at the mirror. He had almost forgotten how nice her smile was. "Good to be back like this."

"Had fun at the party?"

"I left. What were you doing there?"

"...Having fun."

Bruce gave her a suspicious look. "Do I want to know what kind of fun that was?"

"You're quite talkative tonight, uh? Glad to see you content for a change, Bruce."

"Avoiding my question."

"The answer to your question is no." She smiled devilishly and Bruce didn't know what to make of the conflicting emotions inside of him, as one part wanted to snap at her for obviously making a fool out of him again but the other part wanted to replace that provocative grin with some other expressions that involved the both of them and not so many clothing layers in between.

"Anyway," Diana went on, "I'll drop by to bring you the clothes I bought, tomorrow probably. On the hopes of you wearing them, at some point. You know, out, maybe."

Bruce rubbed his chin skeptically. "You know...I might as well."

Diana arched an eyebrow. "Oh, really? You? Out? With something else than a tuxedo?"

"There's a first time for everything, Princess..."

Diana squinted her eyes at his mysterious tone and at that moment, Alfred pushed the second doors to the dining room, with his silver serving tray. In less that two minutes, plates and dishes of all kinds with more meals and 'orderves' than she could count had filled the table, and Alfred invited them to 'dig in'.

Alfred couldn't stop watching them eat together. It all felt so natural and the conversation flowed nicely. His Master seemed to be very at ease and he wished that, at long last, he would do something to prolong the stay of the Princess. He had been delaying it for far too long, if you asked him. If one person could handle the lifestyle of Bruce Wayne and the Batman, that was Princess Diana, known as Wonder Woman for obvious reasons; she was wonderful indeed.

And Alfred's fairytale bubble popped, as Diana let her fork loose and fell on the back of the chair, and Bruce, dropping his second glass for the night, fell face-down into his food.

"Perfect." He sighed and kept on chewing his bite. This was the second time it happened today. How many times would he have to rub the alcohol stains off the floor anyhow?

Princess Diana woke up first. "Are you alright, Princess?" He asked. "Or...should I say, Master Bruce?"

A look of fury and despair on the Amazon's face confirmed the second. "Why am I here again?!" Bruce shouted, through Diana's voice. "No!" He frantically searched around his pocket for his phone. Once he found it, he called Zatana.

" _Zatana speaking!"_ Music was playing in the background.

"Zatana, we have an issue-"

" _Hey, Diana! I'm so happy we managed to get you back. Though I'm not so happy you left so early, wish you could have-"_

"It's Batman speaking."

" _Oh no. What happened, why do you sound like Wonder Woman? Don't tell me..."_

"Yes. We went back to how we were." His voice betrayed his frustration.

" _Okay, okay. Don't panic. We found out we can reverse it. Don't worry, the formula probably just needs something to stabilize it and it will become permanent. I think I can have it ready tomorrow. You can wait another night, right?"_

"Be quick."

" _Sure, sure."_ He heard Black Canary call ' _Hey, Zatana, it's time for you to redo some Whitney Houston_!'. " _So, um, yes, tomorrow. See you!"_ And she hung up.

He slammed the phone on the table as Diana was waking up.

"Curse the universe! Why this again?!" She cried, instantly realizing what was going on.

"Relax, Princess." Alfred said. "Master Bruce took care of it."

"Zatana will make the antidote permanent tomorrow." Bruce said, exhaling.

"I believe you can stay here for the night." Alfred hurried up to say. "You need to take a shower; Master Bruce took a dive onto his plate..."

"I can tell." Diana replied, flaring her nostrils at the feeling of food on her face. "Thank you. I think I'll accept your invitation, if _your Master_ agrees, of course." She looked at him in anticipation but Bruce gave her one of his usual, cold looks.

"You know I do."

"Follow me then, Princess." Alfred said, standing up. "I'll give you a set of clean towels and you can shower while I prepare a bedroom for you."

"Thanks, Alfred."

Once they were out of the room, Bruce banged his fists on the table and growled. Why did everything have to go hellishly wrong, just when they seem to be going right?

"It' just another night, Bruce..." He said through his teeth.

 ***It will be a nice night, I promise. Now, I believe this fic has about another two chapters and it should be done. I hope you liked this chapter, thank you very much for reading so far and please do leave me some feedback!**

 **PS.1: Yes, I love the song, I can't seem to be able to leave it out of my WonderBat fanfics! Hahah!**

 **PS2: Sorry for any typos I might have not seen!***


	8. Chapter 8-Scars, Earplugs and Blood Pres

***Hello, Wonderbatsies! Thank you for being patient for this update once again. I tried to condense the scenes and finally list this fic 'complete'. I'm glad you enjoyed this trip with me. Happy reading!***

 **CHAPTER EIGHT- SCARS, EARPLUGS AND BLOOD PRESSURE**

Diana shuffled her wet hair and pushed the balcony door open. Alfred had prepared the largest guest room for her. It was lavishly decorated and Diana was certain she had never slept in a bigger bed, even though she was raised in a palace.

The nightly breeze felt pleasant against her wet skin after the shower. Luckily, it wasn't c old enough for her to need to put something on yet; Bruce in plain briefs it was again, then. She leaned over the marble railings and watched the moon. It was almost full. The sound of curtains being drawn beneath reached her ear and she half-smiled, as a playful idea crept inside her head. That was right, Bruce's bedroom was on the floor just under hers. Taking a look around the dimentions of the balcony, she calculated that his bedroom's porch was wider and longer. It would do.

Taking some steps back, she ran to the railings and pushed herself off; Bruce's sturdy hands were ideal for that maneuver. With a small mid-air turn, she managed to land quite silently on the porch underneath. As she had predicted, Bruce had left his balcony door just a little bit open.

"Télia." She mumbled and pushed it open, dragging the curtains along. (A/N: Greek word for 'perfect'.) Bruce, in her body, was standing wary by the side of the bed, in a satin nightgown –something that most definitely Alfred had ordered for him to wear, and a battle stance. Damn, Diana thought, she looked good.

"Relax, Bruce. No intruder would enter your room this messily." Diana said, inviting herself inside.

"What do you want?"

"Some company, I suppose. But I wouldn't like to wake Alfred up at this hour." She smiled and approached the bed. "Come on now, we both know you wouldn't get much sleep tonight either way. You're too frustrated for that."

Bruce remained silent. How did she always manage to read him so easily? He took some reluctant steps to the bed and sat on the right side as she made herself comfortable on the left side and his lush sheets. "This is nice." She said, taking a look around the room. When she had passed from there before –reclaiming her original body, she had been too ecstatic to thoroughly notice the decorations. The few there were, at least.

The main piece on the opposite wall was a big portrait of his parents, Martha and Thomas. Martha was painted sitting, dressed in a dark blue dress and wearing some lines of pearls around her neck. Thomas was standing by her chair, having his hand on his wife's shoulder. He was a very charming man.

"You look a lot like your father." She noticed.

"I've been told."

"Though I think your brows and eyes resemble more those of your mother. Hm. I don't know, can't decide."

"What a dilemma."

Diana huffed at his irony and turned to look at him, smiling. "I like that gown. You look good."

" _You_ look good."

" _You_ look good as me, then."

"You can have it once we change back. I don't think I'll be needing it."

"Nah, I think I'll leave it here…" Bruce arched an eyebrow; he knew that tone, even though it was coming through his voice.

A few minutes went by with none of them speaking and Diana broke the silence. "Tell me, Bruce, where did you get this?" She ran a finger over a long scar over her –currently- sixth right rib.

"It was…my first time." Bruce half-smiled and Diana arched an eyebrow.

"What?"

"Brawling with Penguin. Wasn't aware of his sword-tip umbrella yet."

Diana rolled her eyes but enjoyed the fact that he just joked. "This?" She asked, showing him her right triceps, where the skin was redder than the surrounding tissue and somewhat rough.

"The Brainiac Explosion."

"Oh, I see." Diana replied, recalling the incident. "What about this one?" She pointed at a rounded scar on the outer side of her left thigh.

"Bane and a rusty pipe."

"Ouch. This?" She rubbed the knuckle of her left thumb, where she had noticed some weird markings.

"Bitten by a genetically modified monkey."

"Here?" She ran that thumb along her jaw, until she felt the small scar.

"Fell on the side of the sandpit when I was five." Diana grinned. "You've been paying close attention, Princess…"

"Well, I've lived in this body long enough, don't you think?" Diana gave him a meaningful look. "I've taken long bubble baths, I've rubbed all kinds of ointments on your skin and tried to find the pants that fitted your bottom better. You can say, yes, I have been paying close attention. Have you?"

Bruce arched his eyebrow and ran a finger along a scar on his left forearm. "I think you got this with Cheetah."

Diana nodded in recognition. "Indeed I did."

"This one?" He pointed to a small burn-like scar over his right knee.

"Sinestro."

"And then there's…" His voice faded off.

"Which one?" Diana asked, scooting closer.

"Here…" He practically whispered, drawing the nightgown up. It slid smoothly on the soft skin underneath, until he reached right underneath her breast. Diana observed a small but ugly scar that she remembered very clearly. She took a good look into Bruce's eyes. Though they were just her own, they felt different when it was Bruce's look she was receiving. She ran her finger over the scar and felt him instantly tense up.

"It's peculiar, isn't it?" Diana said, in a low voice. "How…even though we're switched, we seem to be attracted to our own bodies, isn't that right, Bruce?" His steady and intense stare was all she got as an answer. She grinned lightly. "And, yes, it's very screwed up but…I guess this is solid, pure physical attraction…"

Bruce abruptly lowered the nightgown and sighed. "Stop, you don't have-"

"To admit that I'm attracted to you so straight-forwardly? Spare me." She rolled on her back and stared at the ceiling. "Why hide it? Life is short. And it's not just physical, or am I wrong?"

"What got into you now?"

"Look at all those scars we have, Bruce. We could have died so many times so far. Who knows when we will die eventually in this life we're living. So I don't think I'll waste my precious life-time by not saying what I feel like saying." Bruce remained silent once again and Diana laughed. "Seems like you'll spent your time being laconic as always."

"Tomorrow." Bruce spat. Diana rolled her eyes to him and saw what seemed to be the most determined look her face could have. She grinned.

"Good, then. Oh, and, I got that one when I rescued my mother from Hades. Death has _literally_ scarred me." Bruce snorted.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

" _À santé."_ Zatanna said, handing them the vials. "This time for good."

Diana and Bruce exchanged a look and nodded, sitting simultaneously on the couch. "Bottoms up!" Diana exclaimed and they swallowed the potion.

"It should have its effect soon enough, I added an accelerating factor. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll take my leave."

"Thanks, Zatanna." Diana said.

"No problem, I'm only doing my job. See you!" With that she left.

"Here." Diana said, coming up with something to fill their time till they switch again. "I forgot to show you yesterday, but your eyes are truly beautiful. Take a look." She swiped through some photos on her phone and handed him the device.

Bruce's eyes widened at what seemed to be a…selfie of his. Diana had obviously posed in front of a window, as a lot of light was hitting his face, blurring out much of his features. His eyes, thanks to that light again, were a clear shade of dark sea blue, looking through the camera.

"Diana, what have you done?!"

"Brought out your natural beauty, obviously. Here's another angle." She swept right. Another selfie, but his face was turned three quarters.

"Okay, I'll just go ahead and-" Diana snatched the phone out of his hand.

"Hell no, these are not getting deleted. I want to keep them. You look so pretty!"

Bruce arched an eyebrow. "You think taking that phone out of my hands can stop me from deleting them?"

Diana gave him a disapproving look. "You keep your hacker skills away from my things."

"…Sure."

Diana was about to mouth a retort, when she felt her eyesight get blurry. It was coming on. In a second, their heads fell on the back of the couch.

Diana regained consciousness first, as it seemed. She stretched a bit, feeling comfortable in her own body again. Seizing the opportunity, she approached Bruce and went for the mobile phone in his hand. It was hers, after all. She slowly slid it through his palm, when, in the blink of an eye, his fingers grabbed it hard again and Bruce met her gaze with an angry look. Diana gave him a warm smile. Bruce relaxed his grip and Diana reclaimed the phone.

"Thank you." She said, as he got up. "I guess…I'll catch you later?" Bruce nodded and exited the room.

Diana flew quickly to her room. She could have walked, but she longed to feel her feet above the ground. It had been too long!

She opened her door and was surprised to see a dress she thought she'd never see again, laying on top of her bed. She thought that it must have cost a lot to repair such a dress; but it was definitely worth it. There was something else too, a small note. She took the white card in her hands and read it.

" _Put this on and meet me at Pierre's Bistro at 9. –B.W."_ She smiled.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

Her high heels were thrown away some seconds after they came through the front door. His tie was undone when they left the entrance hall and the buttons of his shirt had been scattered all over the first sitting room. Diana's bun was a memory by the time they reached his bedroom and now the dress that she loved, had fallen at her feet since none of them could have cared less about it, as he pushed her to the wall, planting sloppy kisses on her lips, her neck, her collarbones. His impatient hands caressed her delicate lacy underwear, getting lower. He brought his eyes to hers. Diana felt he looked like a predator looking at his pray, his eyes shining almost menacingly.

"Time to show you a couple of things I found out about your body, Princess…" He muttered.

Five seconds later, her panties were long gone and she was digging her nails into his shoulder blades, biting her lips hard.

Alfred 'tsk'ed at the fallen buttons in the sitting room. He'd have to vacuum again in the morning. He smiled to himself, pushing his earplugs further into his ears, thinking this was the wisest present he could have made himself.

OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO-OOO

 _Many, many years later…_

Diana was always surprised at how well she could see for a woman her age. Though she did need some glasses to read occasionally, it wasn't like her beloved husband, who went around with three different kinds of glasses, depending on what he wanted to do or see. What she envied him for, though, was his hearing. It was still amazingly good and that gave him the chance to tease her about not hearing as well as she used to.

Standing on the old guest room's balcony, she could easily make out her grandchildren playing at the garden. She had to tell which one was which to Bruce though. "They all just grow up too damn fast." Was all he said, retreating back inside.

They had left the Manor for almost twenty years now, leaving it to their daughter and son to inhabit. Though they were always welcome, they didn't want to constantly nag their children, and so they had decided to reside in one of their cottages to the South. They did come to visit every now and then, of course. Now that Christmas was close, it was time for a family reunion.

Bruce wasn't really fond of the season's spirit, so he never did really participate in decorating the tree or baking sweets, but he had learnt to invest some time into buying presents for his own family at least. Diana was particularly happy that he did at least that.

"Think they'll like them?" Bruce asked after pondering for some moments. Diana knew what he meant.

"Of course they will, honey. We always get nice gifts, this isn't the year we fail."

"But teenagers these days are just…too hard to understand."

"Teenagers are not hard to understand, Bruce. We're just too old to understand their times, that's all."

Bruce made his characteristic pout-y face for whenever Diana mentioned they were getting old. Yes, he knew it, of course, but he would do his absolute best not to let it show too much. Even though his back hurt every time he tried to stand up tall and straight.

Diana sat on her rocking chair and opened up a book. "Why don't you sleep a bit, we're having a late dinner tonight."

Bruce nodded, making a mental note not to eat too much lamb tonight; one could never be too careful with cholesterol. With that, he drew the bed covers away and readjusted the pillows –he needed a stack of two or three nowadays. He made himself comfortable and closed his eyes, ready to fall asleep. Some moments later though, his eyes shot open. The rhythmic sound of Diana's chair going back and forth had stopped, without another sound of her movements coming. Bruce saw Diana's head dropped to the side, with her hands hanging down motionlessly and panicked. He was about to stand up when his eyesight became hazier than usual and he fainted as well.

-ooo

When Bruce regained consciousness, he found himself sitting on the rocking chair. With an unusual visual clarity, he saw…himself sitting straight on the bed.

"No…" He mumbled, and, naturally, Diana's voice sounded.

Diana, through Bruce's eyes, gave him a horrifying look. "Don't tell me…"

Bruce's unstoppable cursing and Diana's laughter was a peculiar combination. Peculiar enough for their daughter to come storming into the room and standing there speechless, trying to understand why her father was laughing like a maniac and her mother was cursing worse than a sailor.

It took a while for Iphigenia to understand what her parents were saying, but she did recall them telling her a story when she was young, about a funny magic mess-up they had once. All in all, she got, they had switched bodies. Again.

"I guess that potion wasn't very permanent, love." Diana said, and Iphigenia cringed, since her father never called her mother anything else but her name and 'Princess'. It was just too weird.

"We need to call, um, what was Zatanna's son's name again?" Bruce said.

"Zachary. Don't worry, I'll call him, tell him to brew you some of that potion again."

"No, wait, Iphigenia. Tell him to go through his mother's old recipes." Diana clarified. "Potions were considered outdates back in our time, imagine now."

"Noted. You stay here and relax, I don't want you having any problems out of shock now."

"We aren't going to die, your old folks can take some things, Iphigenia!" Bruce complained and their daughter laughed at the image of her mother being cranky like her dad.

"My, my, Bruce. We have a lot of things to settle till we get back to normal." Diana said, cupping her face. "Help me out with your glasses! How do you get about seeing this blurry?!"

"I beg your pardon, my eyes are not _that_ blurry!"  
"Who are you kidding? You just don't want a fourth pair of glasses, don't lie! I know you like the back of my hand, old man! Or…old woman more like." She laughed again and Bruce rolled his eyes.

"The black ones are for far, the metal ones are for near, and the brown ones are for focusing and reading." He went on and Diana nodded.

"We also need to exchange pill schedules! When do you have to take your blood pressure pill?"

"Before dinner. I will remind you."

"Yes, let's do it this way. We tell each other when the time to take something comes."

Bruce sighed. "I can't believe this is happening again…"

"What can we do, Bruce, darling? Now, be patient. If the potion lasted for forty years, the next one will also last for forty years, which will probably cover the remainder or our lifetime."

"Macabre."

"Let's be realistic."

"Yes, we need to be realistic." Iphigenia agreed, reentering the room. "Zachary will see this through as an emergency, even though he's on family vacation. It will take more than just a couple of days to brew it though, he said. He doesn't know if he can get all of the ingredients, that's why."

Bruce growled but Diana huffed smiling. "It's okay. We'll survive."

Iphigenia nodded. "Now, I'll let you get used to this, okay?"

"We've been through this again, Iphigenia." Diana said. "We know the drill."

"Alright, alright! See you downstairs later." She shut the door behind her.

Diana tried to get up from the chair and squealed, as her back complained of the movement. "Hera, Bruce! What's with this back?"

"I just slept badly tonight." Bruce replied, getting up and walking to the bathroom. Diana heard him curse a bit since he almost forgot he had to sit down now. At least her hearing was a bit better now.

The family Christmas photos they took that year, turned out to be a favorite among many Waynes, as they were the only ones that showed Bruce wearing a big, fluffy woolen pullover with two red-nosed reindeer embroidered in front, baking treats and singing the carols with the grandchildren. As a surprise to many, his voice was unbelievably good. They collectively decided to ignore 'Diana''s grumpy face in the photos, though.

 ***I used the same offspring as my other fics (so if you're interested, take a look there). Sorry for any unnoticed typos.**

 **Thank you very much for reading this fic. I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I liked writing! It's been very fun and thank you very very much for supporting this. I will see you all again!***


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